Babysitter with a "violent" 10 year old.

[mommyof3kiddos]

I am a stay at home mom that is going to school this semester full time for nursing.  I don't have much experience with finding childcare.  I did my homework and received a recommendation through a few friends.  The person I found is WONDERFUL.  She's very caring with the kids and overall seems great.  She did tell me that she had a lot of problems with her 10 year old from the time he was 3 until he was 7.  She said he was very aggressive and violent toward his little brother but only acted this way at home with his parents, never at school or with babysitters.  During the time my kids will be at her house, her kids will be at school except for about 20 minutes of one of the days.  She told me that he is no longer violent or aggressive but it does concern me as to why her child would be that way?  I've heard that children that are abused physically or sexually can behave in an aggressive manner and that's what scares me the most about sending my kids to her.  Am I being overly paranoid?  I know I am going to be afraid no matter who I send my kids to, should the fact that her child used to be very aggressive be a "deal breaker" when it comes to sending my kids to her house for childcare?

[margypops]

No I dont think you are paranoid you are being aware and protective, and a good Mom.My feeling is look for someone else, too much worrysome baggage here, so you may be somewhat overprotective but in this instance she has told you things that may be troublesome look around for someone else. Good Luck

[RockRose]

How old are your children?  Are they old enough to clearly communicate if they've been harmed?  

I agree with Margy that it's a concern,  but since you got recommendations from friends and it's only 20 minutes of exposure,  and you find her wonderful,  this might be worth considering.

I wouldn't leave just a baby there who couldn't speak out.  

Additionally,  I see a lot of aggressive older siblings who abuse their younger siblings during childhood.  I wonder what she meant by violent and aggressive?  

[mommyof3kiddos]

My kids are still very young, 4, 2 and five months. After speaking to my husband and a few friends, I have decided to try to find someone else.  Thanks for the advice!