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Child Behavior (Expert Forum)
Bedwetting
Answered by
Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D. - Child and Adolescent Psychotherapy, Family Therapy, Crisis Intervention
Harvard Vanguard Medical Associates
This forum is for questions and support regarding child behavior issues such: Child Discipline (behavior management), Normal Child Development, Parent-Child Communications, Social Development
Bedwetting
by Donni McMasters, Oct 27, 1999 12:00AM
My son is 4 1/2 and he has never awaken dry. We recently answered an ad for problem bedwetters. The man came out and explained that the bedwetting was more of a symptom of poor sleep patterns. My son also has a tendancy to walk in his sleep, not on a regular basis just sometimes, he also grits his teeth and will not sleep under covers. This person said that these are all typical of bedwetters. If my son was dry just occasionally I would be more apt to say he will outgrow this condition. But, as it stands he has never been dry. We have tried a reward system but that didn't help. We also went 2 wks. without pullups and he never had a dry night either. I gave up because it was upsetting to him. He is now showing an adversion to wearing them and complains that they "stick" to him and I'm sure they are hot. But, I am at a loss as to what to do. This program costs $1700 dollars with a money back guarentee. That is alot of money to us and I was wondering if this type of treatment would help in our case. I don't want to wait until he is 7 to start saying that this is a problem and should of started it sooner. I would like to take care of this now when it is easier for my son. I am doing this for him because of his strong dislike for the pullups, if he didn't hate them so, I wouldn't have a problem with waiting. So, I guess my question would be; should I wait a little longer or should I go ahead and procede with some sort of profesional help?
Doctor's Answer
by Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D., Oct 28, 1999 12:00AM
, Oct 28, 1999 12:00AM
Dear Ms. McMasters,
My opinion is that your son is too young for you to invest in the system you mentioned.
While approximately 75% of children are dry during the night as they go into their fourth year, this still leaves a considerable number of children who are not. In other words, your son's situation is not particularly unusual.
Bed-wetting occurs most often during the first third of a child's sleep, and likely takes place during a phase of partial arousal as the child transitions from non-REM sleep. It is at this same time that types of partial wakenings, such as sleepwalking and sleep terrors, also occur. These are not serious problems - they are a normal part of development during the early years.
Your son is a bit too young to profit from reward systems, so it's not surprising this did not work. Reward systems are a form of behavioral conditioning, as are the various wet-stop alarm systems that are employed to help children stay dry. To attempt such systems prior to the age of seven is not likely to benefit the child (though, of course, there are exceptions to the rule).
Eliminating pull-ups can be a useful measure to help children who are trying to master toilet training during the day, but this same measure is not productive in eliminating nocturnal enuresis.
You would not be making a mistake to be patient. See how things go over the next year (or even longer). Should the bed-wetting persist, you can always attempt conditioning systems later on, at an age when your son will be more ready, developmentally, to profit from them.
Finally, to assist him now, try to limit his intake of large amounts of fluid after 6:00 p.m. or so, though you don't have to have an absolute restriction.
My opinion is that your son is too young for you to invest in the system you mentioned.
While approximately 75% of children are dry during the night as they go into their fourth year, this still leaves a considerable number of children who are not. In other words, your son's situation is not particularly unusual.
Bed-wetting occurs most often during the first third of a child's sleep, and likely takes place during a phase of partial arousal as the child transitions from non-REM sleep. It is at this same time that types of partial wakenings, such as sleepwalking and sleep terrors, also occur. These are not serious problems - they are a normal part of development during the early years.
Your son is a bit too young to profit from reward systems, so it's not surprising this did not work. Reward systems are a form of behavioral conditioning, as are the various wet-stop alarm systems that are employed to help children stay dry. To attempt such systems prior to the age of seven is not likely to benefit the child (though, of course, there are exceptions to the rule).
Eliminating pull-ups can be a useful measure to help children who are trying to master toilet training during the day, but this same measure is not productive in eliminating nocturnal enuresis.
You would not be making a mistake to be patient. See how things go over the next year (or even longer). Should the bed-wetting persist, you can always attempt conditioning systems later on, at an age when your son will be more ready, developmentally, to profit from them.
Finally, to assist him now, try to limit his intake of large amounts of fluid after 6:00 p.m. or so, though you don't have to have an absolute restriction.
