Boosting son to be more recreative, positive and success oriented

[vinitadudhat]

My son is average scoring 12 year boy (70% around) , but lacks innovativeness, continuity and interest in studies. He is not able to explain his problems and I feel problem in understanding his difficulties in this regard. I need guidence. Thank you.
Vin

[specialmom]

Self motivation is a hard thing to teach kids and as you and I know it is usually the key to success.  I'm sure you've limited the tv and computer time and I would continue to do so.  If it isn't on, then he will have to occupy himself somehow.  Maybe have him choose 2 things he will do each week (social, athletic, art, music or scholastic)  that he he would most like and he has to committ to them.  Then after a set period of time if he fulfills his obligation he gets a reward of some sort.  Perhaps earning the tv/computer time with time spent doing other tasks would help.  Is his confidence low?  I would say that all people are different and some are more active and social than others.  I sometimes have to push myself or be pushed to do certain things.  With that said, I am now an adult with hobbies I love, a Phd, family and friends etc.   But I work at my own pace and find my own ground in things.  When I feel pressured I close down a bit.  The key with a kid, I think, is to push without making it personal.  Have them part of the decision process as to what extra things they can do.  Motivate him without making him feel bad for who he is.  Good luck, you sound like a really caring parent. You want the best for your child and I hope that he lives up to his full potential.  Oh, and laziness can also be low energy.  Many people are "busy bees" as I call them that are in constant motion and go go go all the time.  Other people have a lower energy level and tolerance for activity.  It is just the way they are.  It could be lazy but also just a lower level of energy than you're used to.  

[vinitadudhat]

Thanks specialmom,

No, what I observe is, he doesnot do things evenif they interest him (laziness?). He lacks positivity towards goals and efforts to be done to achieve them. He deploys his free time with TV or computer games, but never does drawing or any project evenif he is good at it. I am unable to understand how to counsel him towards right track, and how to explain him to keep his leisure habits at back which are hinderance to his progress. He has capacity to earn more marks, participate in extracaricullar activities and games, and be social. But he prefers to be at home or non creative in his capacities too.

What do you say.

[specialmom]

Are you saying that he does things but only because he has to and doesn't have any real passion for it?