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Hi ,I have a grandson who was also a littleLittle noses decongestant Little tummys stinker from about 2 onwards, he is now 6. He was very hard to like as a 3 year old & did absolutey discusting things-spitting on people, noseNose fracture picking & eating , hitting his mother. His parents are very good although Mum is a little bit of a pushover! the only thing I can tell you is that since they sent him to private school where he gets more one on one education, he has improved no end.He is very intelligent & presently reads everything he can get his hands on. He has won spelling bees at the age of 5 & is just a very busy boy. I am very practical & honestly he still grates on my nerves as he is just looking for something to do ALL the time- but I don't see him very often as they live far away from us.His little brother is the complete opposite, very reserved & a real little sweetheart. Maybe' your little guy has the same high intelligence & will improve if you don't spend all day with him? send him somewhere that offers a good learning program (even that may seem advanced for him) to stimulate that busy little brain. Apart from that just try & keep your head with him, I know it is hard, good luck.
It sounds like your son's behavior has gotten worse since the baby or maybe started at that point? It's very hard for kids to adjust to siblings. Instead of pushing him to like the baby, allow him to feel upset about it. Respond to his frustration in love and let him know that it's okay to be sad, lonely, frustrated, or upset that this baby is here. If you begin to respond empathically with him he will feel validated and some of the aggression will decrease. Boundaries are very important and he definitely needs them yet he needs to feel like he has some control over what is happening in his life. If you begin to respond to his emotions you may see some change. If it continues take him to a child therapist that can easily work out his aggression. Hang in there, it will work out.