My son is 7. He has been getting in trouble at school and on the bus on a regular basis the whole school year. He is very good at home and doesnt normally misbehave. My husband and I have tried everything as far as discipline. We used to spank him up until about two years ago for bad behavior when we decided that this may make him more agressive and started grounding him and taking toys away. He is very agressive toward the children at school and on the bus. He hits, trips, or almost anything physical you can think a child can do to another kid. We put him in counseling to try to help starting a month ago because we are at loss as to what to do with his behavior. We have been taking toys and other things he loves in about a week increments at a time when he misbehaves. He is good the whole week he doesnt have these items but when he gets them back he misbehaves again. My husband was physically abusive to me from the time my son was three months old until he was about 5. I am not sure if this has anything to do with it. My husband and I are seeking marriage counseling as well to help with Aeric's behavior. My husband is not abusive to me but there is still tension between us. Please not we have a 5 year old daughter who does not show any agression and doesnt get in trouble at school.
This 'house angel, school devil' phenomenon is frequently seen in children who have been exposed to traumatic events at home, including abuse or marital strife between their parents. You have made a sound choice by commencing therapy, for yourselves and for your son. To some extent, your son will change as you change. However, it's also important to implement a systematic behavior management plan between you and the school. You have to be informed each day about your son's behavioor in school, so that you can then make decisions about his access to privileges. I'm suggesting you make his privileges (TV, video games, outdoor play, etc.) contingent on his school performance on a day by day, not week by week, basis. Young children tend to do better on the '24 hours at a time' plan.
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