Confused

[Sweetipi]

I don't know how to start. But I am mad and confused right now...
My husband's ex wife call him and told him that thier daughter felt like being sexually molestated with our 4 year old boy. The story was my step daughter was laying down on the floor waching tv. Then my 4 year old toddler jump on top of her  and started humping her. I was shocked when I heared this for this happened 3 or 4 weeks ago In my house and all of us are there and no body see it. I was wondering if this is true since my toodler don't do this to his brothers. Also I feel like I don't believe the accussation of the ex wife for she have been accussing similar situation of my older boys. She don't want us to talk to the daughter for she might feel in between... I don't know what to do I want the ex wife to just leave us Lone and stop all the sexual accusation. I feel torn for I love my toodler so much and at the same time I feel so close to my step daughter.
I need advice.

[Sweetipi]

I talked to my step daughter and she did admit that she told her mom that my 4 year old go on top or her and hump on her. And she did felt molested with him. I explained her things but the damaged has been done. Now this scares me for I have older sons 13 and 11 years old... I am confused what I am going to do... I live my step daughter but I can't just let her hurt my kids specially her brother:(

[coolas]

I think it's ridiculous that this woman is suggesting that her 12 year old was 'molested' by a 4 year old!  Silly woman!  And that's how you should treat her, like she is being silly and ridiculous.  Next time the step daughter is with you, tell her you understand that your son made her uncomfortable and that you have no problem with her telling him off next time he does something like that; empower her to handle it herself and don't make her wrong, but at the same time, make sure she knows that this is normal kids stuff and she shouldn't make a big deal out of it.  Take the high road with the ex and don't let her create unnecessary drama.

A-

[RockRose]

Sweetipi,  I don't know what's going on here.  A 12 year old girl can not be "molested" by a 4 year old child.  If he starts curious play with her,  it's her responsibility to be mature enough to stop it and redirect him.  If it continues she needs to tell you that ____ is touching her and could you talk to him about privacy matters.

A 12 year old might not fully get that,  but her mother certainly should.  For a grown woman to state that a 4 year old "molested" her 12 year old while they were both watching tv,  this woman sounds dangerous to me.  She really sounds like she poses a danger to your family.

If I were you I'd talk to the girl next time she's over,  and tell her if the little boy makes her uncomfortable,  please just let me know and I'll come engage him in playing with blocks or sidewalk chalk for awhile.  

I don't think it will be long before this woman accuses your family of something that could actually stick - good that this isn't it.  

[Sweetipi]

She will be 12 years old on February.

[RockRose]

How old is this girl?