First week of preschool and he is a nightmare!

This was the first week my son started preschool, he goes 2 times a week from 8:30am to 2:30pm and he is three.    The first day they said it was ruff but he is learning.   I explained to him that he needs to listen to his teachers and if he didn't he would get in trouble. so I basiclly gave him a pass.  He went back on thursday he was in the bathroom by himself the let the kids do everything in the bathroom on his own.  He was yelling out the vent so one of the teachers told him not to do it.  He punched her in her side he had a time out.  They told me right when I got there. I am not sure if it is because he is/was a preemie. I am stay at home mom.  This is also the first time he is away from me in a form structure.  I took away TV for the day and he is not allowed to go out with his aunt for a day fun.  I would like him to have good reports.  Does anyone have any good suggestion?  Also after 11am its playtime and I told them if he hits or is misbehaving to call me Iwould come get him.  Because playtime is a right not privilege.  one more ps my husband says I am the only person he listens too.

[specialmom]

Hi--------  well, your little guy is awful young.  And it is very true that a lot of preemie's are immature due to their "real" age vs. their birth age.  I'll be totally honest, that is a long preschool day for a 3 year old.  My kids went 2.5 hours.  Would you be able to pick him up early?  Maybe at lunch time?  

But . .. big but . . . he shouldn't be punished at home for what he does at school at 3.  Even early elementary kids shouldn't be as punishment has to be immediate to be effective.  Putting him in time out at school is appropriate.  

I'd go to the library and gets some books on emotions to help him express himself better.  That way he will be able to identify what he is feeling and use kid language to tell his teacher and then maybe he will handle his frustration/anger/sadness better.  I'd also get either at the library or the bookstore a book called "hands are not for hitting".  

I'd try to get him to parks, swimming, etc. as much as possible on the days before school.  It helps calm a child's nervous system.  Physical activity can greatly help behavior.  

And you want this to be fun.  I'd work with the director to come up with a plan.  I think the day may be too long for him and shortening it may help some.  Best of luck to you.  It will be okay and remember . . . he is only three.  good luck

[Sandman2]

  I agree with specialmom completely!  At this age, nothing you do at home to punish for behavior at school will work.  In fact it is probably counterproductive.  
  It sounds like the preschool is doing the right thing with timeouts.  It won't work overnight, but it will work.  It is nice that you are tying to help, but you are doing it the wrong way.  Even with first graders, I would tell the parents to let the teacher handle the matter.  Since discipline has to be immediate at this age to work, what the parent would do at home only confused the child.  I think the other recommendations by specialmom are certainly worth trying.

[Digan21]

Thank you guys gguys for your help.  I am just trying do the right thing maybe I should try some postive reinforcement like a chip system and I am going to go ick that booku today!