Five (5) Year Old Boy. Behavior-School Issues.

[aclaudio79]

My 5 year boy has been having behavioral issues at school since he started Kindergarten this year.  He turned 5 in the end of July so I've been told he's a young 5 year old.  They know he can do the work in school but the problem is getting him to do it.  He seems easily distracted and upset.  I have seen some improvement since we've been working hard with him everyday at home with discipline and homework including extra work.  I seldom let him watch tv anymore and when I do it's only the young childrens education shows.  I removed all his toys from view and do not let him play with any toys or games.  I told him he can earn his things back as he improves in school.  He is easily upset and I'm trying hard to weed that out of him but calming him down and explaining that things will be okay and looking for a resolution.  My son is very smart and is always trying to be sneaky to get what he wants.  His teacher keeps pressuring me to have him tested.  I am willing to help the school and my son but am worried at the schools motives because they are giving me false information.  They say he needs a PCP which is an aide that would sit with him in class and keep him on task and well behaved.  However they told me I need to submit a request for testing by a child studies team in the school district.  When I contacted the case manager at this office she told me that for a "PCP" it is a different procedure which doesn't involve the child studies team testing.  She told me that I would have to get a referral for an aide "PCP from his physician and submit it to the school for the "PCP".  When I spoke to the teacher and the principal about this, who are supposedly very familiar with this as they stated numerous times that they've had other children in the school who receive the same help, they keep mentioning the child studies team reviewing my child.  And when I mention that the case worker said it is a different program a "504 plan" they say oh yes that's right and go on and on.  My son is able to keep on task with supervision and has improved on doing it on his own at home".  I have seen some improvement in his school work that comes home, but it seems that the teacher at this point is insistant on being right and proving her point that every response to my son is negative.  Her complaints are that he takes a long time to finish his classwork and is fidgety in his chair.  When I've been in her class I've seen other students being repremanded and even put in  a "quiet spot" because of not staying in their seats so I know my son is not the only child in class who does this (not condoning).  I will admit that my son can be difficult to deal with and we are working hard on changing his manner.  He is an only child and we never really spanked him they way we were and let a lot of things slide.  Now, at the sign of a whine, complaint, laziness or disobidience we are quick to respond with a time out or discussion of "not acceptable/allowed".  I have asked my son if he is bored in school his response was "yes".  Does he think the work easy "yes".  Is he afraid of getting something wrong "yes".  I guess if I could get some light as what I should think of the school's motives (small school only 2 kindergarten classes) and how to get my very smart, sneaky boy to understand that he has to follow the rules all around, most importantly in school.  He knows what the rules are and is does push the bounderies.  As I stated there has been improvement: staying in time out with less arguments, less arguments towards any discipline (tv. toys. playtime), school work/home work.  Please let me know if there are any questions for me.  I know this is a lengthy post and I probably left a lot of stuff out.  But with 5 years of a child life it's kind of hard to put everything in.  Thanks to all!

[valiantrepeat1947]

I know exactly what you are going through, Iam from England and even though its a different lay out of schooling to yours we had the same problem with our old nursery claiming that our 4 year old needed extra help with he`s emotional skills in school, They said he was hitting out at other children and teachers, so at first we agreed with it but we found out later that it was the EXTRA FUNDING that they wanted and were using my child as a scapegoat to get it, as there were several other children doing exactly the same as our child at school where he had picked it up because he had never had done it at home.
We have since taking him out of the Private nursery for a State nursery and he is doing ok at the moment. And long may it continue!

Sounds a bit fishy with the school for your child in what they are stating.

Good Luck