I'm a step parent of two five year olds. The boy eats fine but, the girl cries consistently at almost ever single meal. She is considerably underweight for her age and it has become a health concern for everyone involved and her doctor. Her mother, with whom both children spend 90% of the their time with due to my husbands work, gives her brownies, cakes or treats at meal time if she does not want to eat what has been provided. At our home this is not acceptable. We do not cook foreign items or try and make her eat things we know she wont. I'm talking pizza, hamburgers, hot dogs, etc. She will eat a few minimal bites then say shes full or her stomach hurts. When we try and encourage, she turns on the water works. This is so very frustrating because we don't want to be the parents who force her to eat something, on the other hand she is underweight but, we don't want to instil the behavior of substituting junk for meals!
Since this little girl does not spend much time with you, there is little you can do directly. Prepare the meals and serve them and then do not make an issue about what she does and does not eat. Be sure not to offer items as substitutes that you know are not good for her. it's OK to have a single choice as a substitute for what is being served, but don't cater to her preferences. An example of a regular substitute can be a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. You might pursue an independent medical examination in light of the possible nutritional deficits. The mother's behavior can reasonaly be perceibved as neglectful.
My oldest son was not an eater. He would cry everytime he had to eat and that was even in infancy. It was very frustrating and we tried abolutely everything to get him to put on weight and eat. We did the nutritional shakes and drinks, healthy yogurts you name it. Nothing worked so what we decided to do is not put so much worry on him at dinner time. I think he developed fear of eating because we were putting on the pressure. Anyhow my son ended up having huge tonsils which were removed and low and behold he ate and put on weight. So he probably was gagging with those huge tonsils. He also had a hernia and the doctor felt that before it became apparent to us visually it could have been kinked on the inside causing him intestinal discomfort. where am I going with this? Im not sure but maybe get her checked at the pediatrician to look for large tonsils or tummy problems? She clearly has some eating issues that need resolved asap. I agree with the doc since the mother is which the child all the time it makes it very hard for you to step in and fix it.
My son also has this problem.... He had reflux as a baby and a hernia.... the chiropractor really helps. We got to one who specializes with kids and it's amazing..... I think he only eats small amounts because it hurts.... and he's scared. after a trip to the chiro, he eats like a man.... Good Luck to you
Both of the children had their tonsils taken out two years ago and for the girl this did nothing for the eating situation as the doctor indicated it may help. As far as any other health issues the mother primarily takes both children to the doctor...on a regular basis...and she has not informed us of any other medical issues for the little girl. The mother makes a very big deal if we want to take the children out of school for any reason, so it is somewhat hard for us to take them to our own doctors or do any other activities that may involve time missed from school. Currently during the school year we pick them up after school on Fridays and drop them off at school on Monday mornings. Didn't think of the chiropractor though...good idea thanks!
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