For two years now my husband and I have been dealing with our 14 year old son and his grades declining. We've taken things away from him,grounded him to his room,etc. He has now just came home with 2 out of 4 grades from his mid-term finals. 1-D in Biology and 1-F in English. We've talked carmly over and over with him and nothing seems to work. He Does have ADHD and takes meds. I'm at a loss.We welcome any imput. Thank you
What I've discovered is you can't wait and hear how things turn out at the very end - you really have to follow this weekly, even daily. The thing is, your sons failure isn't just one failure, it's weeks and weeks of failure.
We keep up with grades online. Does your school district have that? What a blessing, really, although I don't have to do any of this with my two other boys, and in my heart I don't think I should be keeping this close tabs on the academic success of a child past 2nd grade. But without constant monitoring and feedback, my teenager would just flounder right now for some reason.
So. He has to sit at the kitchen table for at least an hour every evening, and if any grades except math (we give him a little more leeway with that, it's very hard and we're not trying to punish inability, just laziness) fall below 80, he doesn't drive until the grade is back up.
So far, so good. It's working fairly well.
If your school doesn't offer constant online monitoring of grades, can you set up something with teachers where they email you his progress weekly?
Thank you for your feed back. God, all we ask from our 14 yrs. old is nothing less than a "C". His school does have an on line grade thing, and I do check it it weekly, but the teachers don't always use this system. I feel the same way, that I shouldn't have to keep a check on a 9th grader.
Thanks again for your input.
What are the comments his teachers share with you or put on his report card? Is it solely about effort, or does he have other problems with organization, study skills, specific academic subjects? Will he let you work with him nightly. It should not add to the stress. Many kids can't accept help from their parents. if not, are there before/after school tutoring services available through the school. Also, an individual tutor can sometimes help (advanced high school student, college student or professional) if you can afford it. Consider if he might benefit from a psycho-educational evaluation either through the school district or privately to rule out even subtle learning disabilities.
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