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Avatar universal

How to discipline kids who "don't care".

My 8yr old granddaughter and 6yr old grandson will NOT mind and no matter what their parents do,it doesn't help. They've tried "time out",taking privileges away,spanking,making them stay in their rooms,etc. and nothing works,because the kids act as if they don't care.Time out? So what! No tv or video games? So what! Spankings? So what....and the list goes on. Bedtime is awful.They refuse to stay in their rooms,sneak back and forth to each other's rooms,etc. How do you discipline kids when nothing you say or do works?? They're basically good kids...not vicious or mean,etc. just wanting what they want,if they want,etc.THANKS.
Oh...there's a 2yr old that shows signs of starting this behavior too,after watching their shenanigans all day....
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Avatar universal
A related discussion, 14yr old son refuses to do Anything! was started.
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Avatar universal
A related discussion, Response to Kids who don't care was started.
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242606 tn?1243782648
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
It's not a matter of tricks, it's a matter of systematic behavior management. The book I recommended provides just that sort of approach. Children by nature are pleasure-seeking and impulsive; left to their own devices they will do what is pleasurable. It's the parents' job to set limits and help children to learn impulse control. The problem is with the parents, not the children.
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Avatar universal
Yes,I agree that the parents need help in learning how to set limits,etc. But getting help like that around here is hard! We live in a very rural area and
professional help like that is very limited,if not non-existent. My daughter has read several parenting books (tho not the one you mentioned) and has tried various "tricks",but like I said,nothing works because the kids don't care if they get put in time out,have privileges removed,etc........
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242606 tn?1243782648
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
This may sound like a very big assumption on my part, but nonetheless... In situations such as you describe with such young children, the responsibility rests with the parents. Your report that 'nothing works'  indicates that the parents' methods of implementing limit setting and discipline are faulty. It will be crucial for the parents to seek help around their behavior management. While they should not attempt to manage this situation without professional help, they would benefit from reading Lynn Clark's book SOS: Help for Parents.
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