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Inappropriate Sexual Behavior between siblings.
I’m the oldest of 5 children I have three Sisters and One brother. My sister is 22, My brother is 19 and the twins are 14 years old.

My brother will often walk up behind my mother and puts his arms around her and kisses her neck and cheeks then lifts her up off the ground and bends backwards so that her body is resting against his.

He will also walk around the house in nothing but a towel when the twins and their young friends are around the house.

He will often sleep in their bed with them and I’ve found him sleeping and cuddling with one of the twins 13 year old friends on the couch holding her close to him while he is sleeping.

He will also sit one of the twins in his lap with no shirt on and he will be wearing running shorts but with no underwear. While he has one of the twins on his lap he will wrap his arms around them and rub his check against their cheek and kiss them on their neck and cheek while he has his eyes close.

He has a very abnormal behavior with his older sister which is 22. They are extremely close and it is believed by 2 of my Uncles and I that they’ve slept together and had sexual inter course with each other.

My brother has a very close relationship with the twins 13 year old female friend. We’ve caught them alone in his vehicle and a few times when no one else was home I would come in and find home with her alone in the house.

I myself lived and was raised by my Grandparents until I was the age of 12. My grandmother passed away then I lived with my folks it was like living in a whole other world. I am now married with a son I live a couple of hours away. My wife doesn’t want my family any where near our son and family I understand that and I agree with that. I guess what I would like to know is what type of advice or help can I give the twins.


This discussion is related to What is normal sexual behavior between siblings?.
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Congratulations on holding your ground. I think it is very inappropriate for the brother to act the way he has and does. Just worry about keeping your children and wife safe.
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That is not normal behavior, and I strongly recommend that you contact your brother, verbalize your thoughts and feelings, and ask him about your suspicion.  
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Not addressing an issue does not deal with it. Not addressing it is acting in a way that it is nonexistent. I think that it is great that you are protecting your son. However,  what if there are others who needs protection? Who knows your brother may admit he needs help, or he may deny everything. On the other hand,  if you feel that going to your brother will not make a difference, then do what you feel is best
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Perhaps talk to your brother 22 FIRST. He more than likely will admit nothing and may even get defensive.You know him better than we do and if he might get violent or he's just not so bright about what he's doing. GET HIS ATTENTION before it's too late

Perhaps a talk with your mother but it sounds as though she may also be involved so she may not be forthcoming with information either. Could this behavior have started with your mother by any chance years ago? Their behavior sound suspicious also. She is old enough now to know that's a sexual offender behavior. A 22-year-old son with children. She will probably say he is just being affectionate. He needs help if he is sexually involved with a 13-year-old. Or his sisters who are 14 years old. All adults involved seeing this know this.
You need to get the girls alone and talk to them... like you KNOW what's going on... and see if they will talk to you about it. Tell them he could be in serious trouble if he doesn't get some help for his abuse of young girls. And make sure they all know it by LAW it's considered sexual abuse if more is going on than just lap sitting. A few of the red flags tell me there is more going on.
If this 13-year-old becomes pregnant or decides to tell her parents and your brother is involved it could be statutory rape regardless if it's consensual or not (she's a CHILD) & he's an adult and that is a sexual predator label and jail time. He also must be signed up in a register as a sexual offender for the rest of his life. Probably never being able to get a job...etc...
. A 22 year old man, brother or not,  sleeping in a bed with 13/14 year old girls is totally unacceptable and your mother surly knows this. Just asking for trouble with the law enforcement. It's your call you must protect your young sisters and their friends if you can because your mother is not.  If talking to them won't work contact social services and tell them what’s going on. You don’t have any other choice. Your wife is right try to keep your son out of this and protected. Be sure to continuously talk to your son about how thing are supposed to be between sisters and brothers, husband and wives as he grows older. Some children are never taught the right way to behave (socially acceptable behavior) or the way it's supposed to work within families and children don't automatically KNOW some of this is it wrong. If it feels good they think it's just fine.

P.S. You don't mention a father in this post. Is their a father in the house or just your brother and all these girls? OMGosh!
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Sorry made a mistake... your brother is 19 but all the above information still holds true.
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Wow. Not sure what to say here for sure. I'm a nurse with a minor in psychology so I will do my best. It sounds wildly disturbing and inappropriate but not knowing your brother or the family dynamic in matters of sex, nudity and boundries, I have to consider context. If you and your siblings grew up in a home where physical affection of any kind excluding sexual, was the norm then your brother may just not realize he is doing anything wrong or doesn't recognize boundaries when showing affection outside the family. How does your mom react to his touching, hugging or kissing? Does/had she allowed and encouraged it or does she try to stop it? If she allows or encourages it, he again probably doesn't see it as abnormal. The mother/son bond can become intense and sick in some cases. Electra complex is a real thing. Is your brother developmentally delayed or mentally ill? These could explain his behavior as he definitely wouldn't understand social rules. Was he sexually abused as a child? If so, then he would have formed early on a very twisted idea of what is and is not appropriate and could explain his behavior. If none of these apply, then you must consider that his behavior is dangerous and predatory and he must not be allowed to continue touching, cuddling or kissing others, especially 14 year old family friends. Studies have repeatedly shown that child molesters rarely respond to therapy or treatment to stop them from abusing, but you and your family could confront him intervention style and get him into therapy. If he is a sexual abuser, despite best efforts will likely remain one. As a victim of childhood sexual abuse, I can say that you should keep other kids away from him warn your daughter and her friends to be aware. Not sure if any of this helps, but I wish you luck with whatever decision you make.
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