I am a preschool teacher and have recently acquired a 4 year old child who seems to intentionally urinate on themself when angry, bored, or simply wants to change their clothes. The child has been involved in the same school for 3+ years and I have talked to past teachers and learned they experienced the same problem. The child can have consecutive days without accidents or consecutive days of 3+ accidents a day. I've spoken with the parents and they experience the same behavior at home. I've offered positive praise, negative reinforcement, and positive reinforcement. I feel like nothing is ever going to work and I'm out of ideas. The parents and I have decided to try to stop the problem before it begins. We will put a diaper on the child as soon as they have an accident, as to distract from the want to change clothes all day. The child is not overly hyperactive nor impulsive so I feel that ADHD is not the cause. Can this simply be an attention grabbing technique? If so, any advice on redirecting to a new behavior?
just reward system- If it is defiance and he is in control and he is strong willed there is something out there he LOVES- his parents will find it- money? 30 minutes playtime at burger king in the bounce house on Friday evening if he has been dry all week?
That is the only motivator I can think of- I know it's hard when you want an answer NOW- and I do agree with the pull ups or diaper thing- child experts say it is confusing but you can't spend all day changing a 4 year old.
When you set whatever goal you set for rewards DO NOT change it or deviate from it for about 3 months- he seems smart but he is being TRAINED still at this age- don't try so many different tactics at once or jump around- he has to be TRAINED and consistent consequences is of course what trains a four year old..... I know it is HARD.....
If you sense that he just wants to change his clothes often and this is why he is urinating, can you offer him the chance to change clothes during breaks in the preschool day? Maybe his mom could pack 2 extra outfits or so for him, and during breaks if he wishes he could change clothes? My middle son (now 17 years old) was a clothes horse and liked to change clothes frequently.
BTW, "negative reinforcement" is learning based on removing a negative stimulus. For example, when the alarm clock is blaring you learn to reach it quickly to turn the darn thing off. This is not a big deal in this discussion, but I'm a big believer in "learning theory" and for some reason teachers have begun to think that "negative reinforcement" means punishment. It doesn't - far from it.
I just choose to think in this case you will find out faster if he can control it by offering rewards.
I can also see Rock Rose how your suggestion would show if it is a control issue.
And I believe negative reinforcement also means "removing something that is undesirable to make the end result a desired one" a rat will not be stung over and over if he finds one path in a maze brings him a sting- A strong willed child that is rewarded and can be reasoned with well is going to be motivated and trained easier than strong willed child that blah blah blah- who cares what I think
anyways I just hate anything whatsoever negative associated with toileting- it's a just a hang up of mine-
My 6 year old whose turning 7 in 2 days has been peeing on the living room floor. I'm unsure when or how long as the odor didn't appear until after we had some very humid days. I know he was doing it for awhile about a year or so ago & I thought we'd gotten it under control. His reason was because he didn't want to pause his movie so, he just decided to pee on the floor. His clothing was never wet and it was in an area of the living room behind the couch which i set up as a little play area. We live in a very small house, we're very limited on space. We've been in the same house for 2 years. There's really no changes recently except my boyfriend moving in but, since he practically lived here anyway I don't think that was it. I know my son is mad at me because he feels like it's my fault that his Dad isn't around. But, his Dad has never been around so, I doubt that's the cause. He's just being lazy & doesn't want to pause his movie. I've been working on the floor for 2 days straight now. At 1st I thought it was one of the pets. Until we were going through all his belongings behind the couch that is. None of them had been peed on. So, basically he'd moved toys out of the way, peed on the floor then covered it up (I'd say it's intentional). I'm losing my mind here. He acts out so much and then there's this. I'm @ a loss. He hasn't been able to use his Chromebook or IPAD (gifts from others) for a few months now due to bad behavior. He's now lost tv and finally I snapped today. I forbid him to go in any rooms w carpet which is only the living room my room which he doesn't need to go through to get anywhere. I've talked to his pediatrician when it first started she told him stop being lazy & use the toilet. Gee thanks as if I hadn't tried that already (minus the part about being lazy). He really only acts out with me. He behaves fairly well for my Mom & very well for my boyfriend. We've tried therapy but, the therapist up and quit suddenly. She decided to go to another practice that didn't take our insurance & he was devastated as all they did was play together. They never talked about anything they just played. It seemed senseless to me but, I don't want to go that route again unless we have to since he really struggled for a long time after she left with no warning.
Taught head start for 8 years here, and I had skittle girl who done the same thing. I'll be honest she done it because she was bored, out of spite because of restrictions of learning areas that she wanted to play in that day that wasn't the day for, or just because. She'd pee in the floor, in the play refrigerator, and in the play house. No matter what she'd go. Well purely one day by accident really I was telling her that her mom forgot to send clean undies, and I had to put boy undies on her. She had a melt down. She didn't want to put them on. She argued with me for 15 minutes about doing it, until finally I just told her that it was all I had. It was that or a diaper from the baby room. She wore them, but was mad the rest of the day. I told her mom not to bring me any more either. I caught her the next day getting ready to do it, and I just told her to go ahead. But mom still hadn't sent her undies, so she'd have to wear boys again or a diaper. She never peed in my classroom again. He's doing it for a reason, and you know it. It starts at home it sounds like. Make sure the parents are being consistent in going to the bathroom. If they are picking him up and putting pull ups on him all night, but sending him to school for you to potty train it's pointless. You know it happens too. I'm sorry but to me it has to be one way or the other. I know it's frustrating, and nasty. Been there.
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