Child Behavior Community
Is different bad?
About This Community:

This patient support community is for discussions relating to child behavior, discipline (behavior management), parent-child communications, and social development.

Font Size:
A
A
A
Background:
Blank
Blank
Blank
Blank Blank

Is different bad?

Hi. My son is 4 years old .I have always noticed he does not play with other kids or engage rather he will just stay in the background on his own while other kids are running around playing why what does it mean?I used to think it was because it was. Kids that didn't know english but now I don't know what to think I was watching him in the playground all the. Kids were running around playing and he was just walking around it hurtt me so much..why ?
Related Discussions
7 Comments Post a Comment
Blank
Avatar_m_tn
    Ask his teachers.  They are used to seeing how kids interact.  It may take them a few more weeks of watching to get an opinion.  But if you don't ask now, they will not watch.
Blank
535822_tn?1389452880
Some children are just plain shy it takes them time is this a new school he is going to , once he gets used to it he may mix more, do the children speak English as that could also be a barrier ?
Blank
171768_tn?1324233699
he could be a shy temperament (normal), he may have anxieties, or it could be a developmental delay. It is normal for children to be shy around children they do not know or in larger groups. How does he do with kids in the neighborhood, other kids in the family, or in small playdates? If he does not interact with children he knows, then I would be concerned.

What is he doing while he is in the background? Does he watch them (probably anxiety  or shyness) or seem unaware or uninterested (possible developmental delay).
Blank
973741_tn?1342346373
Hi there.  It is not bad to be different!  Everyone is unique and an individual.  

But, I know how it is when you see that your child is standing out from the crowd.  I witnessed the very same thing with my child in preschool and it broke my heart.  My son has sensory issues that made his social skills delayed.  He had a hard time playing with other kids.  When it is a reason like that beyond just being a loner by nature, then it is important to help them.

My recommendation, regardless of the reason why he is alone, is to start socializing with him to help him practice.  I'd try to set up some one on one playdates with kids at school.  You can meet at a neutral spot like a park and then you stay engaged with the kids while they play and help your son learn the ins and outs of playing with a child.  And if he has no trouble with his skills, you just be there for encouragement to interact with other kids.  My son did have some trouble and I guided him through it.  You can also have a play date at your house.  Again, stay near by to help your son.  Keep those short, one to two hours only at his age.  

Then he'll build a comfort level with some kids in his class and build his social skills.  win win.

My son has a developmental delay and wanted desperately to play with the other kids.  He just didn't quite know how.  Things that came naturally for others, did not for him.  I had to teach him.  And-------- certainly a language barrier would make it even harder.  
good luck dear
Blank
Post a Comment
To
Blank
Weight Tracker
Weight Tracker
Start Tracking Now
Child Behavior Community Resources
RSS Expert Activity
242532_tn?1269553979
Blank
Emotional Eating Control: How to St...
Aug 28 by Roger Gould, M.D.Blank
233488_tn?1310696703
Blank
New Cannabis Article from NORTH Mag...
Jul 20 by John C Hagan III, MD, FACS, FAAOBlank
242532_tn?1269553979
Blank
3 Reasons Why You are Still Binge E...
Jul 14 by Roger Gould, M.D.Blank
Top Children's Health Answerers
13167_tn?1327197724
Blank
RockRose
Austin, TX
973741_tn?1342346373
Blank
specialmom
134578_tn?1404951303
Blank
AnnieBrooke
OR
Avatar_m_tn
Blank
Sandman2
San Pedro, CA
757137_tn?1347200053
Blank
allmymarbles
NJ
1006035_tn?1391310794
Blank
skepticalpeach
MN