Little girl with suicidal ideation?.

I hope you can advise me.  I wrote to you some time ago about my own son and found your advice very helpful therfore I thought you might be able to advise again in respect of a friends child.  I am a professional working in the field of developmental delay and mental health, because of this I was approached by a friend who had found a very disturbing poem written by her 8 year old daughter in her school satchel.  The child had given the poem a title 'why not kill yourself?'  she went on to say she saw no reason not to and that it would make you feel better.  She further elabourates and advises the reader to take a knife, stick it against their chest, count to three and push it in.  To complete the note she has drawn a picture of a knife dripping with blood.  This is a summary of the note - I cant remember the exact phrases she used but my initial feeling was one of  alarm.  My friend is going through a divorce at the moment and she is aware that her daughter is 'struggling' to cope with all the changes.  I know nothing at all about this kind of thing and advised my friend to seek advice from some on with the necessary knowledge.  But I have no idea who this would be.

Also I wonder if this letter is really cause for alarm - or is the childs  way of expressing anger and sadness, how should she respond to this? -  and how worried should she be?

I will gratefully pass on any advice you can offer.

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

Dear HW,

This sort of reaction definitely warrants professional evaluation ASAP. Now, it may not precisely indicate that the child actually contemplates an attempt to do what she describes, but at the very least indicates a level of distress so serious that it has resulted in suicidal ideation.

If your friend is not certain whom to approach for a pediatric mental health evaluation, she can start with the pediatrician, who perhaps can offer some direction. Other resources canbe any local child guidance clinic or mental health agency, outpatient departments of local hospitals, government mental health/social services agencies. Any request for help should include the urgent nature of the situation, and the parent should bring along the picture you described.

It also is sensible for the parent to raise this directly with the child, in a form somewhat like this: I found this picture in your book bag. It looks like you are very worried and upset, so worried that you have even thought of hurting yourself. Let's talk about this. Dr. KDK

[JENISE RUSH]

THERE IS A BIG REASON TO BE VERY ALARMED BECAUSE IF SHE IS VENTING OUT ANGRY EMOTIONS SHE IS EXPESSING LIFE THREATNING IDEAS I FIRMLY BELEIVE IN CHILD ANGER MANAGMENT THESE PEOPLE TEACH HER TO IDENTIFY HER FEELINGS AND SHOW HER WAYS TO EXPRESS THEM AND VENT THEM IN SAFE POSITINVE NURTURING WAY.IF YOU GO TO A BIG BOOK STORE LOOK IN THE CHILD SECTION FOR BOOKS ON HOW TO DEAL WITH THESE ISSUES IF YOU CANT AFFORD PROFESSIONAL HELP.BUT PLEASE IF YOU CANT CHANGE THE PROBLEM THIS WAY FOR HER SAKE GET HELP . SOONER THE BETTER FOR HER ALSO FOR OTHER SMALL CHILDREN AROUND HER SAKES WHO CAN BE INFLUENCED BY HER DRAWINGS AND WAY OF THINKING DO IT FOR EVERYBODY.PLKEASE IF YOU NEED FURTHER HELP OR JUST SOMEONE TO TALK TO I CARE AND LOVE ALL CHILDREN MRS RUSH 9599 BRAYTON DRIVE #461` ANCHORAGE ALASKA 99507 GOOD LUCK!

[YVETTE]

My question is for Jenise Why are you asking pople to write to you regarding thier problems are you a docter or counselor or are you just voicing your opinion? The reason I ask is because this is my first time at this site and I have a five year old with whom I am struggling to understand her behavior and whay she acts the way she does as well as what to do about it. I am a single parent I live with a relative and her four children and every day it's just a struggle. I have seen your responses and they seem to be contradicting or different to the ones the docter is giving . I don't know if your just giving a second possible resolution or if your telling a person otherwise? Just confused that's all hope you can understand Thanks

[sglqrtz]

I am appauled by 450sman's response. I am sorry for Mrs. Rush to have to be exploided they way she was. I read Mrs. Rushes response, and feel that as a parent she gave very good advise. It doesn't matter of her personal life, that is none of your or mines business.  Infact, with 4 childern, and a divorse, that makes her more experienced, and that makes me what to hear more from her.

Who do you think you are. this forum is about the well fare of child. Not to personally get at someone.

one last thing, to HW, I hope things are better with your child. I feel that the two previous responses have covered most of it. A professional person could help you out way more than any of us here. God Bless, and take care.

[450sman]

My intention was not to run down Mrs. Rush.  My intention was to give people some information about the person giving advise to them about raising their children.  To give good sound advise you must have good sound experience.  Mrs. Rushes children were taken from her years ago by the court.  Mrs. Rush has not demenstrated good sound parenting with her own children.  What worries me is that she can sound good sometimes but most of the time the advise she gives is completely against the professionals.  I being a parent myself have seen this with my own eyes.  I will just continue to hope that she does not give someone who is in desperate need of help the wrong advise.

[Attorney]

450sman have you heard of slander?Mrs rush,s internet server is looking into this problem for her.This page is designed for posting questions to the doctor, and public may make comments in helping others.This site is not designed for extortion of others if you are not happy with Mrs rush,s personal life please take it up with her personally this is a public web site and if caught you could be charged with slander,extortion,harassment,your response will be removed again as for it is totally inapropriate and useless at this site.As for others I apologise on behalf of Mrs rush .She has been going through a rough time with harrassment over the internet lately due to her filings with the court in a custody battle for her kids whom she loves deeply.The statements made by another here are immature and hopes you will all understand the retaliation .