my son has been in his room more often scince i got him a laptop. That was when he was ten now i have security cams in every room expect the bathrooms(because i'm not a prev). As i am a gamming parent i don't pay much atenion to my child's ativities,though i still play games like uno and stuff,ride bikes,help with homework,and play with rc cars. But around 10:30pm as i was gaming i saw something on my secruity monter for his room it looked unusal (I AM SAYING I SPY ON MY FAIMLY THE SYSTEM IS TO SEE IF ANY ONE GETS INSIDE OUR HOUSE). Also, these cams are in the wall. So i zoomed in ...... and i saw a penis......I havn't said anything to my son. Because i don't want him to go emo or have issues.....i've notcied that he does it when i'm not home or inside.Though i am scared that he could be .... i don't know...like waning to have sex badly ....... because he told me about this really hot girl he has to do project with so she's over from time to time.....and i've noticed he has been doing better in school.....i also checked his computer for anything by using our server links......he's been looking up porn and stuff......SOMEONE PLEASE HELP ME
This is completely normal behaviour for his age, I am not so sure I agree with yours and having cameras into his room. Your not respecting his privacy. That is what little boys do and that is when they do it the most. Do you live in an unsafe area to have all those security cameras in your house? Why do you have them in everyroom?
anyways i would just leave it and let him do his thing, at least he is doing it in his room so no one can see him and not in places where people can see him.
You say anything to him either because than you lose the trust and respect of your son. Have you had sex talks with your son? That is where you need to start.
I am going to be straight with you, you need to ditch the cameras and stop worry about your son, I am sorry if that sounds rude but in my opinion what sounds more creepier is the cameras all over your house. I wouldnt want to live there knowing could be watching me at any time.
This is normal behavior? Maybe the masturbation as long as it's not getting out of control or compulsive to the point that he isn't doing much of anything else.
The porn has to go, though. First off, he's not even old enough to be looking at that stuff, so it's illegal. Secondly, it's very unhealthy for him (especially at such a vulnerable age) to be looking at this stuff. It's going to give him a warped view of what sex is supposed to be which could cause problems later on down the line when he's trying to have a healthy relationship with a girl. And let me tell you something, most girls (and women) don't like guys who are into porn. It exploits women among other things.
You act like your helpless. Your not. This is a minor child, your child. You have the rights to set down rules and expect them to be followed, He has abused his computer rights so you should take away the computer until he can learn to use it responsibly. For one thing, I think 11 is way too young to have a laptop computer. They just aren't ready for such a big responsibility. The computer needs to be in a common area of the house where everyone can see it. This cuts down the temptation to abuse it and look at and participate in things that are unhealthy. Don't forget, most things done in the dark are done in the dark for a reason. The person knows it's wrong or forbidden. I always tell me kids that if you're doing something you know is wrong or wouldn't want your parents to find out, then you shouldn't be doing it.
I think you need to set some rules in your home, now while he's still young, before he gets out of control or starts going down that wrong path. I would nip this one in the bud. I hope you take what I say seriously. I've seen porn destroy too many families.
It is not normal behavior for a child this age to LOOK at porn. I do not know the age at which boys begin to masturbate, so I cannot say that 11 is too young. However, like April said, looking at porn at such a young age can warp his mind, and effect his views on women for the rest of his life. I agree that he is too young to have a computer in his room as well, the computer should be in a common area of the home. This will solve your problem on the surface. But, I urge you to talk to a child therapist to try to understand what effect the porn exposure may have caused your son. He may have an addiction at this point. He will need the help.
Can I ask how you know when he does this? You said you noticed he does it when you are not home, or inside, so I am guessing you are recording, and watching. Though he is looking at porn, and you knew this already, he should have a right to his own privacy. Does he know you are spying on him?
Forgive me for saying it was normal. I meant normal to masterbate at that age and that much (i was going by your topic) I really didnt see the porn issue that was written. That is not normal. Curious for that age, but not normal if he is doing it all the time, while watching porn. The computer shouldnt be in his room period, especually at that age. To me the fact that you have all these cameras and you have the ability to spy on them is completely wrong and an invasion of privacy. i totally disagree with that. Have you had a sex talk with him? Talk to him about, infact get your husband to talk to him about that topic.
Put a block on the porn sites ASAP! I agree with the others, he does NOT need to be watching porn at such a young age. Children his age do not need to see that stuff!! As for the masterbation, there is no "right" age that they begin materbating. It comes very early in some and never for others. He's naturally curious, and has probably hit puberty, or is about to, so it is normal.
I also agree with the other posters talking about the cameras. Luckily your son doesn't know that you have seen him because it could really scar him. I'm surprised he does it in his room and not in the bathroom knowing you could be watching (or does he know there's a camera in his room??). I understand security reasons, definitely, but you have to draw a line somewhere to protect his privacy. I wish you and your son luck!!
Less computer, block on it, allow him about an hour at most , get him involved in sports, he is in the house too much make him stay outside, involved with Ball games and having friends ,soccer and basket ball. Get him off the PC games. and into hobbies interests, be good for you also, if there is a Dad around, how about he gets involved with sports, swimming , cycling and good old Fashioned Fun.using his body the way it was meant to be used and if he sometimes has time to relieve his raging hormones thats also okay and normal, no cameras, thats not normal.
This IS very serious… (PLEASE FULLY READ)
Your son’s obviously been looking material he shouldn’t. Children viewing pornography is illegal—period. Your son’s discovering more than he should at his age. Eventually, he’ll learn how to censor his computer history and etc… You can be turned in for something like this and lose your son for child abuse. The cameras aren’t helping your case either. Yes—it’s that serious. You’re the parent and are found responsible for whatever your son does. You’ll need to censor his computer. Nevertheless, youths can bypass the filter if it’s not properly set. Borrow his computer and look through everything and destroy files, pictures, and etc… that a child under eighteen shouldn’t view. Contact your local internet provider and request information on how to properly set your child filter. You can also block websites through your firewall (Norton) and password your internet firewall so he can’t disable it. This can grow from something innocent into something horrific. Your/his computer can be tracked then your information released through your internet provider to the local police, Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI), Child Abuse Agencies, and etc… and then you’ll be prosecuted by a court of law. Your child will be taken and most likely go to the next of kin or foster care if you’re found guilty for whatever charges you’re accused of. Why? How? If your child suddenly chooses to continue his adventure and commit crimes the authorities would consider him a child ********* without knowing he’s truly the age he claims. Example: A child ********* apprehension group’s on a forum/chat room (etc…) and your son decides to communicate with inappropriate sexual language. For all they know he’s a ********* and WILL try to apprehend him. Which will lead to them coming to your home… thinking you or your husband’s (etc…) the pedophile… arrest you/your husband (or both of you)… they Might eventually learn the truth… then you’ll most likely be prosecuted for child abuse… and lose all your children. Sorry—FACT. Please consider your child doesn’t know any better. Sure—your son might know he’s not allowed to view pornography (etc…), but he/you don’t realize what comes attached with it. I’m not trying to scare you, but this is a very serious matter. Your son might try to experiment on others and etc… if caught… they’ll take him and put him into a detention center… then prosecute him according to his crimes unless found not guilty. I know—your son wouldn’t do that—right… what he’s looking at can cause him to do things he wouldn’t normally do… change his mindset… growing into more and more dangerous obsessions. Please censor his computer, talk with him, monitor his friends, and etc… He might view these things elsewhere and discuss it with his friends. I hope this helps you and others realize the seriousness concerning this matter.
Masturbating at that age is more than just "normal" if he wasn't doing it I'd be more concerned. For the love of whatever deities you believe in (or logic, if you're an atheist) stop it with the cameras...that's just creepy. You should tell him that he mustn't look at porn, because it could get you into legal trouble, but make sure that you give that as the reason, and don't try to make it be about whether it's "acceptable".
If what you say is true, then most women would be either asexual or lesbian. -All- guys look at pron, if you round it up to the nearest whole percent. They just know how to bee subtle about it because for some reason it bothers women.
I agree with the earlier post about how serious porn is on the internet and that you are responsible as the parent - this is a legal issue as well and I would follow the advice of the previous post.
yes, it is fine for him to do this. Although, as he gets older, he may start to gain weight because he masturbates more than once a day, or even once a day. Testosterone helps keep our weight down, and if he ejaculates every day then there are less levels of this in his body.
Boys will be boys. Starting at 12 and for the rest of their lives. You don't need to freak out because all guys get to that stage in life. And porn is normal for kids at that age to want to look at. You also have to know that guys will allways have that sick mind that you couldn't even think of. I'm. Take it from a 12 year old girl. He also could be being influenced by boys at school and their older brothers. But amyways boys just like porn and that "sweet sensation" achived from jerking off. I was so discusted once because I was on video chat with my friend who is a male and he pulled up porn like no bodys business. Ewwie... anyway see their intrested and they think if they do this girls will like them for being " mature" when it does the oppisete. So I think if your his mother (I'm asumeing)tell his father to talk to him because he probably went throw the same things. Male hormones...
well to be honest i am a 19 year old boy and i can tell you that i started when i was about 11 (later thatn most of my friends) and, to be honest, at that point i already knew how to bypass all my parent's locks and child protection things. So no matter what you pay to have put up... he will find his way around it if he wants to look at it badly enough, and to be honest everyone here who says it isn't natural for a young boy his age to be looking at porn is wrong.
You have to remember that people from the older generations never had the access to the internet like we do now.. so it all seems un-natural to them, however if they had the means at their disposal they most likely would've watched it too, and i won't lie i have watched porn since i was 11 years old when my best friend showed me a naughty magazine and i am a perfectly healthy, average, everyday boy. It's just apart of life, boys start to get curious, so the look.. it happens..
and to be honest If i knew my parents had cameras all through out the house and in my room... that would scar me much more than any amount of porn or masterbating ever could...
As a 19 year old boy (who is most likely one of the youngest people to post on here and therefore the closest to that age) I can say just let him be. You can sit him down and have a sex talk with him, and ask him to do that in the bathroom, but nothing about what he did was wrong or not normal for a boy his age. and you might as well forget about bringing up porn... i can honestly say that even if my parents talked to me about it everyday i would've gotten around it and did it anyways, so it might be better to just leave that sleeping dog asleep, because if you bring it up your son will lose trust in you for spying on his history, let alone spying in his room.
Masturbation is normal Period! It seems as if women are commenting her most. "degrades women etc". Look from a man's prospective there is nothing wrong with looking at porn. We have all done it. And before the internet they would look at porn magazines and he would probably steal your JCP catalog magazine or another women's magazine. I think that the talk is a good idea. I have a wife and 2 sons and i looked at porn as a child.. I don't treat women wrong or look at them like objects. Its a fact of life. If you put up blocks he will just get by it or go to a friends house or find another way. Hide it on a mp3 player, usb drive, any type of media that could be hidden and encrypted.
Also for the people saying its illegal because their track you down threw the internet etc. As long as its adult porn why would they? I have friends that are detectives and they would never charge a parent for their child looking at porn and a judge would throw it out. Turn a blind eye to it. I check my sons laptop (he's 12) to make sure no pervs are talking to him and occasionally theirs porn on their. I just remove it and move on. My older son did the same thing and he’s perfectly fine.
As for the Cameras. That just crazy. I have cameras in and outside my house because I live in the woods. But there are no cameras in any bedrooms only hallways and the living room. That’s really creepy. There invading is privacy and his normal growth. What happens when he’s 16 and has sex. Your probably freak out, but that’s normal part of life.
I think you should have a talk with his dad and explain what is going on. It’s hard for mothers to see their kids this way and apparently you need to rethink your parenting. Privacy is a big deal. I am not saying don’t watch them. But too much will only drive them away. In to drugs and such or even actual sex when he’s not ready. Take a breath and look the other way. He’s growing up.. And PLEASE REMOVE the camera from his room..
This man has cameras all over his house. THATS NOT NORMAL. A boy masturbating is NORMAL, and if he has access to porn, of course he's going to prefer it to his imagination. You are all idiots!!! Lock his dad up, what a pervert!
There is nothing wrong with what your son is doing. Masturbating is perfectly normal for an 11 year old. The porn is a little bit unnatural for that age, but deal with it. It would have started sooner or later. I think there is only one creep here who needs help. Its YOU. Masturbating is completely normal, the thing not normal is you watching him. I would have put the cameras in the bathroom instead of putting them IN HIS ROOM. What security reasons could you possibly have to put cameras in your SONS room?!? As for the hot girl coming over, all i can say is good luck for him. But if he ever, EVER, finds out about you staring at him while he master-bates, THAT will scar him for life. It's just life. Get used to it you century-old pervert.
my friend all men ( myself included) have seen porn at a young age and it is not "illegal" it's just frowned upon by people and it's got a age restriction because they don't want to be responsible for teen pregnancy which can happen even if you have never watched porn in your life so don't stress about that and if he doesn't masterbate I **** you not he will be ****** up as a teen/adult
this is NOT normal behavior. Masterbation is normal but watching porno is most def. not. Masterbation is not "normal" if they are have sexual thoughts while doing it. Whoever says this is normal needs to get evaluated. Porno can lead to sex addictions and to much worse things. There is a reason its age restricted. You should put a block on his laptop so he cannot access such sites. They are free and you can monitor exactly where they are going and block any pornography.
Ok listen, I'm 14 now.... So I remember I was 111-12 when I started to masterbate.., but yes Ik from now I still masterbate and I do look up poem and pictures of girl but that's only BC as u get older u get more and more hormones that make u want to ether have sexual contact or masterbate more..... All I'm saying is that the kid is normal he's just like all of us between the ages of 11-18.... I have a brother that is 17 and he has had sexual contact and he said after having sex u stop masterbating
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