My 3 year old son hates to listen!

[Ian'sMomma]

My 3 year old son does not like to listen most of the time.  Every day activities turn into a control battle.  I know that I need to pick my battles, but does anyone have any creative suggestions on how to get him to do the things he "needs" to do...like get dressed in the morning? brush his teeth? etc...without a big fight???  I am at wits end and am tired of having to try and negotiate with my 3-year old all of the time.  People kep telling me he will outgrow this behavior, but I am going to go crazy soon!

[momcrazy]

Sorry to say that I'm not an expert and I don't have any solutions for you. My daughter will be 4 in a couple of weeks and is the same way. She likes to pretend everything is a game and laughs when it's time to do something she knows she has to. Which make me mad when I'm already at my wits end.
Is he like this everyday? I know, we shouldn't have to negotiate to get them to do something so simple. My only suggestion is to try to make it fun. Start singing a goofy song about putting on his cloths or something, if you distract him he might not be reluctant. If he does these things on his own or is learning to do them and you praise him for it, he might want to start doing it to hear your praise. My daughter likes to be independent but, at times acts like a baby, and can't do anything for herself. But, for the most part, she likes when I tell her how proud I am for being such a big girl. Good luck, sorry I wasn't much help. You're not alone.

[anxiousmomtobe?]

Don't negotiate.  Say it is time to brush your teeth, if he does not comply remove one of his favourite toys.  Or set a timer and say "if you get _______ done by the time the timer rings, I will read you a story".

Praise him when he does obey.

[Alexkay2]

I as well have a 3 year old who never listen and I tried making things into a race and seems to work.  For example, I bet  you can't brush your teeth before mommy or can you get dressed before I get to 20 and so on"  It seems to work thus far.  

[djwray]

I can't help, just wanted to comment that i too have a 3 year old that won't listen, I have tried everything. He also won't go to bed. I thought I had that figured out, boy was I wrong!

[mom@homenow]

My son is very strong willed but responded well to "reverse psychology" at 3 (and 4, and sometimes still at 5!) If I wanted him to clean up his toys I would say "Well, I need to go put laundry in the washer- don't you dare put those blocks in that bin while I'm gone!" I'd say it with a smile and he'd scramble to do it before I returned and he'd come find me and say he did it and I'd make a big pretend fuss like I was so upset. He knew, even at 3, that I was kidding and he'd just laugh and act all proud that he'd been so "naughty". I always used a different tone that my "serious" voice.

It still works to get him dressed for Kindergarten on the mornings he doesn't want to get moving. I put out his clothes and say something like "Well, I've got to go comb my hair... Please wait here for me to help you get dressed, I don't want you do it yourself." Next thing you know  he runs into my room, all dressed, laughing "Ha Ha Mommy! I got dressed myself!" And I act surprised and disappointed. It's a lot more fun than fighting with him & can change his mood in an instant. Also he seemed to resent less and less my bossing him around at other times because I guess in his mind I was no longer constantly telling him what to do.