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My 4 yr old's behavior problem
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My 4 yr old's behavior problem

I picked up my child about 4 mths ago from her father's. She was fine for about a mth but now she runs around the room, picking the paint off the walls and jumping on furniture, even climbing on her dresser (which had to be removed from her room) and almost made it crush my other daughter. If I yell, she laughs. If I try to talk calmly and try to explain why she does something is wrong, she just scrunches herself up, crossing her arms and ignoring me, going back to the behavior only minutes afterwards. I've had to get new gates to keep her out of some rooms, but she pushes the whole couch across the room to climb over it, or climbs the TV, even when I leave for a minute to use the restroom, or in sight of her, she doesn't seem to care. She can sit still; drawing, watching TV, playing with her sister, but after 3-4 hours, no matter what new activites I try to introduce, she goes ballistic, even yelling at me and throwing things. Some days she will come to me willingly and say she needs to use the bathroom, but more often then not, even when I ask she refuses. I think her bitting habit (mostly to her younger sister) is a little more controlled but the hitting and screaming is still the same. I've tried timeout; I dont let her out until she's quiet for a good few minutes. I've tried; standing her in the corner, soap in the mouth for her yelling and talking back, introducing new awards for when she behaves, and nothing I do ever seems to work, half the time not even a full day! Outside of the house, she's well behaved until she gets bored if I'm taking to long for groceries or when she needs to leave the park, she runs away from me yelling her head off (often leading to me getting uncomfortable looks). I'm greatly concerned what she will be like when she's older if this continues. Other mother's I've spoke to have told me their children aren't half as bad, or if they are, they never last half as long as my daughters temper-tantrums. Am I doing something wrong?
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Likely the roots of this emotional disturbance do have something to do with how you manage the behavior, as well as with her early life experiences. You made very brief mention of having 'picked up' your daughter from her father's. What does that mean? Was she there on 'visitation'? Was she in the custody of her father? Was she exposed to chaotic family life early on? Whatever, the case, arrange an evaluation with a pediatricmenatl health professional - the behavior is very much outside the normal spectrum.
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