My Daughter is 8 and won't sleep alone

Hello, I have an 8 year old daughter who will not sleep in her own bed. She has been sleeping with me since approx she was 4- he father was killed in 06 and I made the mistake of allowing her to sleep with me and now it has affected her in manyh ways. She has tried to stay at a friends house, but I always get a call about 11pm to come and get her. I have tried re-doing her room. Allowed her to pick out the paint and bedding ect. When she has a friend sleep here at home they sleep in my room and I sleep on the couch. i don't know what to do. I know her losing her father plays a big part on this. She tells me she is affaid something will happen to me. I ensure her that mommy is fine and just in the next room. I just need help. Please can anyone offer advice.

[sw_123]

Is she an only child??? I am having the same problems with my 8 just turned 9 yr old. Does she have an older or younger sister?? I finally had to tell her I would leave any light on she wanted me to, leave her door open, bought her a  tv for her room with a timer and put an intercom beside her bed and mine. I may have to talk to her a while over the intercom but guess what...she is in her bed now!

[suebdu]

I have the same problem and my daughter didn't suffer a loss like yours.  I guess I'm just a weak parent who gave in when she was around 3 to the late night tantrums.  We even put a bed in our room in hopes that she would at least stay in that and just last night she had a 45 min fit at bed time and her father gave in and let her in our bed to sleep.  I slept else where because she is too big and I can't sleep w/her in our bed.  If you find anything that works let me know.  I thought of maybe transitioning to her room by going in there until she falls asleep, but I know that she will wake in the middle of the night to come back to our room-so whats the point-lol. Goodluck!