My Niece lives with us and we are all going nuts!

My mother was raising my 8 yr. Old niece since she was 3. Her father has been in and out of rehab, and unable to care for her.  My mother got sick 6 months ago, and has not been able to care for her. So my husband and I have decided to care for her on a permanent basis.  She suffers from different problems as a result of this movement. We are seeking therapy for most of the problems that have arisen. The main one that is keeping me up at night, is that my niece has been lying. She lies about most stuff, I usually can tell what is her "age" behavior, and things that are rooted deeper than just her age.  Recently she has lied to my mother about the care we are providing her. She has told many untruths, ranging from just silly to serious. My mother takes everything this little girl tells her to heart. My niece can do no wrong in my mothers opinion.  One of the more serious lies  was that she is throwing up in the morning before she goes to school. This is untrue. Our house is so small, that a person cant even sneeze without anyone else knowing. So i get a letter from my mother voicing her concern with this. Any big or little lie was listed as a concern with my Mother. We are so disappointed with my niece, that my husband doesn't want her living with us anymore. He wants to send her back to my mother- who says she is not well enough to care for her. I want to do the right thing. Love is unconditional, and i tell my husband that we will work through this. Added to the mix is my 11 yr old son. He cant stand my niece, but through therapy has learned coping skills in order to deal with this transition. It has been six months now. The lying is still present, and she can't seem to bond with kids in her class. Recently i received a letter from her teacher voicing concern again about telling untruths, and the fact that my niece has recently began to sabotage other classmates into getting into trouble- and being very pleased when they do get into trouble. .  We are praying, and taking her to church, and encouraging her to be honest, and not to take joy in hurting others. But the situations just keep coming. We are exhausted! any advice?

[margypops]

This child sounds very unhappy, and things aren't working out too well,   I suggest that you take her to see the doctor and get some counseling arranged for her .