Nanny looking for advice on how to potty train parents!!

I have been a nanny to a little boy for over a year and a half now and I love him and his family to death! He is now over 3 and half, almost four. He is extremely smart and has an extensive vocabulary. His parents put big boy underwear on him when he wakes up and he has no problem going pee in the potty with me during the day (or them for that matter). He goes pee pee with no problem for his parents and me. I have even got him to go poo poo in the potty twice. The first time was about 6months ago. He would go with me during the day, all week long but after awhile he stopped, he said he it hurt too much and so I let it go. This time he is more than ready but I fear his parents are ruining any progress I am making during the day. He has gone poo poo for me during the day finally after spending almost an hour talking him through it. But he waits till night some days because his parents put a pull up on him and he is smart enough to know that if he waits till then he can just go in the pull up. He also told them its too "hard" to go with them and its easier with me. So they put a pull up on him and he goes at night in it. I am frustrated with the parents but dont know how to approach the situation. They want him potty trained but they dont follow through. I am with him all day Monday to Friday but not on weekends and evenings so any progress I make is diminshed during the weekends and evenings and I feel like I am always starting at square one!! The little boy is very smart and knows with me he doesnt get his way by whining so when I ask him to try to go potty after meals he does. With his parents he says its too hard and they put a pull up on him. They give up so easily when he is more than ready. I no longer want to go back and forth. What should I do?

[specialmom]

As the mother of two boys, this is actually pretty normal.  Most kids pee first and then start pooing later.  And boys are much later at training usually than girls.  3 1/2 is the average for boys.  When he said it hurt, he is probably a little constipated and this can slow the progress.  My kids also went into pullups at bedtime and frankly, most of my friends did as well.  The ones that didn't usually complain of accidents during the night.  Kids that are heavy sleepers will pee during the night.  So, a pull up helps with that.  My oldest son did this whole thing too with the waiting for the pull up.  It took a couple of months and then he stopped it.  Sometimes giving a reward (we did 2 skittles) if they go on the potty helps.  

but seriously, your question puzzles me.  Do you want him potty trained to make your job easier or because you've decided he needs to be potty trained?  These parents trust you with their child and probably would die if they thought you were second guessing them.  You work for them.  If you don't like the way they are handling THEIR  child, then I think you should find a family that you have the same thoughts as.  In the end, everyone will be happier.  Just my opinion.

[skepticalpeach]

Kids know that they can use their pullup and it will be more comfortable than using their undies. The parents should throw out the pullups and put the plastic undies they sell over the regular cloth undies. That will probly help for at night, plus it's less expensive than pullups.

[91004]

I don't know how you would address this. On one hand he shouldn't even being wearing pulls ups in the day at 3 1/2 almost four. On the other hand my son was 3 1/2 exactly when I took it all no pulls up only undies. My youngest is fully potty trained and is 2 1/2 and has been for a while. Now he gets to sleep in one only because he pees all the time but as soon as his feet hit the floor it comes off and back in undies. I don't like the pull ups at night because to me it is saying go ahead and pee you have a diaper on. Yes some kids are deep sleepers but at some age they have to learn to get up and go at night if needed. My son who is five will occasionally have accidents and I started sitting him on the potty before I go to bed. He now will wake up if he has to go. First poster is right about its their child a little rude but right. Still even though you work for them doesn't mean you have to agree with them. I know my old boss I never agreed with anything he did. He was clueless. Did I say it to his face no, but I really wanted to. You are right how can you train him on the weekday when they don't have the same routine on the weekend. In order to get my oldest and youngest trained I was laid off and was with them all day everyday to get the routine going before they were going to their grandparents and then when I got off work with me and it was inconsistant. It is harder plus he now knows with mom and dad he don't have to.  It is a touchy subject and if you do say anything you probly will offend them. I know my ex's wife said something about him still wearing pull ups and I was livid because I was trying and his nannie had him all day till I got off work and no one blamed her only me. I was really offended. So maybe you could suggest things like I told him if he went potty all weekend I would take him to a movie or to eat or to the playground. So if you could let me know on Mon. if he went all weekend that would be good. Or I started this sticker chart and everytime he goes put a sticker on the calendar for that day at the end of the week he gets a prize if he goes more than 20-30 times in week. This way it looks like you are encouraging him when really you are but this should make them look pretty bad when you come up on Mon and he has only went one time when Mon. he went 3 or 4 or 5x.

[atlnsnnycc]

I wunderstand completely.  I'm a nanny an I'm going through the same thing with one of my kids. I am a nanny for three families in a neighborhood, they all share me Monday. Thru Friday.  I've been with them all since 2007. I potty trained two of the children. But I have one that u just described to a T. I started potty training him last yr. Right after his 2nd birthday. An he was doing well with me but with his parents he would do the baby thing an they would fall for it eveytime. The other neighborhood parents talked about how good things were. When I come back from the weekend an ask about the progress they say he didn't put on any underwear an they were jus to busy. We are Nannies, we know what we're doing parents. You hired us for a reason! Luckily I have an outstanding relationship with all three families an I can talk to them about what I think they (as in child as well as the parents) should be doing.  I just need them to be persistent.