Not sure of what to do next...

[Sad_Dad]

Where shall I start???  During the last few months, my four year old has displayed the same type of behavior.  She was in a home daycare, and recently, she started a pre-school program where the class is much larger (close to 15-18 kids) than her former home daycare environment (4 kids).  She has had major outbursts at the new facility where she has kicked, yelled, and scratched the teacher.  Needless to say, it was quite embarassing to be pulled aside by the teachers and directors to be "chastised" about this.  This behavior never happened at the home daycare.  Additionally, about two years ago, her mother and I got a divorce.  I am wondering if her outbursts are attempts to get attention, or is it a delayed reaction to the divorce?  Some have said that kids will experience an "echo" to the divorce later down the road and act out.  However, others have indicated that she was too young to really realize the change after the divorce.  Her mother and I have always been very amicable toward each other, and she has never seen us argue, so I am confused.  We are both are very engaged in her life, and maybe the attention she gets at home, and the attention she used to get at the home daycare provided her are lacking at the new facility.  Similarly, she never has these types of outbursts at her mother's home or mine, so it seems so out of character that she does it there.  She has an older brother, who has never displayed this type of behavior.  I am confused about what I can do to help her overcome this.


This discussion is related to My 2 Year Old having trouble at Montessori School .

[jdtm]

I agree with the above poster - something seems amiss at the new pre-school.  Whether she is overwhelmed with the number of children, or there is too much noise and/or confusion, or perhaps something/someone has scared or taunted her ...whatever.  It might be prudent to be very observant - arriving later to drop her off (see how the instructors interact with the children as well as how the other children interact with your daughter) and earlier to pick her up (same reason). Could you even "pop in" during the daytime or lunch hour to get a better handle on the situation.  As I said before, I feel something is amiss here.

[margypops]

As this is happening at a new pre school and didnt before and is okay at your Home and her Moms ,the problem is at the preschool obviously thre is something out of sinc there ,are the children supervised enough, are they stimulated enough, for a narmally good child to start hitting and scratching and Yelling tells you something ,perhaps you should observe what is happening,and speak to a head Teacher if you have to, change pre-schools? Do not punish your child ask her some questions about the Teacher other children and if she likes school if she says No ask her why?