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Over reacting???
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Over reacting???

My only child, my son will be 8 on the 29th of this month.  The last couple of weeks he has been cursing ALOT on the bus to school and also telling people to "suck his d!ck" I HATE that word. but he also told his bus driver that I was dead and his dad was in jail, Whice reallly hurt my feelings I asked him Why he said that he said because he didnt want to get in trouble on the bus smh. I put him on punishment for the last 2 weeks (no toys, no tv) just books. He dont seem fazed because he continues to curse and talk about his penis. I dont know what else to do. Is he a kid just being a kid or should I call the doc??
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3060903_tn?1390303996
  I don't know if this is possible or not for you, whether you work or have transportation, but i would take him off the bus, until he could act in a respectful way with other passengers and the driver. I would also take him out of school and remove him from his peer group until i got it straightened out. This might sound excessive, but the reason that I would do that is to spend the time to find out exactly what my sons needs were to get him over and through this type of behavior and again, to imprint upon him that this type of behavior is deviant and disrespectful. If you do work, maybe he needs to spend a few special days with mom talking about what's bothering him?
10 Comments Post a Comment
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3060903_tn?1390303996
This is pretty excessive, i have one son as well, and if this happened when he was 8 I sure would be talking to a professional, quickly as to nip this behavior in the bud. He needs also to know there are serious consequences to this type of behavior, not punishment, but professional support. Best wishes for your family. Are you married and is the father in the picture?
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4056442_tn?1349449921
Yes I am married, and his father who is also married so he has 2 sets of parents. My husband is very close to my son and when he talked to him the answer to every question is "I dont know" then when his Dad asked him he said all the other kids were saying it.... My brother just passed away  in July so I'm wondering if thats why he acting out.
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3060903_tn?1390303996
  I don't know if this is possible or not for you, whether you work or have transportation, but i would take him off the bus, until he could act in a respectful way with other passengers and the driver. I would also take him out of school and remove him from his peer group until i got it straightened out. This might sound excessive, but the reason that I would do that is to spend the time to find out exactly what my sons needs were to get him over and through this type of behavior and again, to imprint upon him that this type of behavior is deviant and disrespectful. If you do work, maybe he needs to spend a few special days with mom talking about what's bothering him?
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3060903_tn?1390303996
Is your son being singled out or are there other children also that are acting this way?
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535822_tn?1389452880
sounds like learned behavior find out, ask him who has been saying /doing the same to him, children learn from us and copy ..
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Avatar_m_tn
    First, he is only 7.  For a behavioral change to effect a child of this age it has to be applied when the situation happens.   So to punish him hours after the fact usually is not going to work.
   And yes, at this age, it is common to repeat what all the other kids are saying.  And at least part of this may be attention getting behavior.  I assume he is in 2nd grade and there are many older kids on the bus?
   I do wonder how you found out about this.  I assume the bus driver told you.  If it is only happening on the bus - its one thing.  I bet it is not happening in school (or only happened once) because school usually has immediate consequences.  It is very difficult for a bus driver to punish kids while driving and they can get away with a lot.  There probably is a "herd" mentality going on and he well could be also taking the blame for what other kids are doing (especially if he is one of the younger kids).  It is difficult for a bus driver to know who is saying what.
    I guess the most important question I have is you said, ' he continues to curse and talk about his penis."  When and where does this happen?  It makes a great deal of difference as to how this is approached.
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4056442_tn?1349449921
When I talked to him the other day he told me that all the other kids on the bus can say it. He also told me that he got "suck it" from WWE ( no more of that) I did talk with his bus driver and that's how I found out. And yes it is just on the bus. Needless to say I will be driving him to school.  
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3060903_tn?1390303996
I think that's the absolute best thing that you can do Mom, I just know that the extra time spent in the car will be a blessing for both of you :) God Bless your family.
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535822_tn?1389452880
I am glad its all come to light I expect many were involved ...school bus could use some more supervision ...in my opinion.
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Avatar_m_tn
   Thank you for getting back to us.  It was pretty much as I would have expected from prior experience.   Enjoy your time with him in the car - it will pass all too soon.
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