My granddaughter is 7 1/2 months old now. I live a distance away so I have only been able to see her every couple of months for a day or two at a time. She has very loving parents (my son and his wife) who are both professionals who work very long hours. Her maternal grandmother, a retired professional, is providing child care during the week for 10 - 12 hours per day; this would seem to be ideal but I am concerned about one aspect of the situation, and I do not know whether my concern is valid. The other grandmother apparently wants to ensure that the baby does not suffer from sensory deprivation, but seems to me to go overboard in the opposite direction. She is constantly singing to the baby, dancing with her, shaking toys in front of the baby's face, etc. The TV picture is on all the time (no sound). The baby is never allowed to just relax and process information. When the baby is fussy, the grandmother picks up one toy after another and rattles each in front of the poor child's face. When I visited last month, I actually witnessed the baby (6 months old) either pushing each toy away or grabbing it and flinging it away while she fussed. The grandmother did not raise her own daughter (a nanny did) and I have a theory that she is trying to prove something with her grandchild. I raised three children and gave them plenty of love and attention, but was much more relaxed about it. I would talk to the other grandmother, but there is a significant language barrier which gets in the way of conversation of any depth, plus she is rather insistent on everyone doing things her way. I am really concerned that if the baby has my son's personality (low-key and needing his own space), that such conditions could easily overwhelm her. Am I being overly concerned?
I understand your concern I personally feel that a lot of attention talking, dancing and interacting is good at all ages for children ,they thrive on it, reading to small babies is an accepted way of ,yes, stimulating them, she probably doesnt do it all the time it could be that whilst you are there she does it as an entertainment and showing the Baby off. Why not join in the fun, you may find you like it.
Thanks, Margypops. That was my original thought - that it was just something that was going on when I was around (and, yes, BTW, I do know how to interact with babies). However, my son has expressed the same concerns, so it apparently is also happening on days when he is working at home. But perhaps she is just acting like this when other people are around and is not behaving like this constantly.
If your son is also concerned it may be good if he has a quiet word and asks her gently to let Baby have some time to her self as you may be right that there is too much going onwhat does her Mom say? ,and I do understand where you are coming from, as although I think a lot of playing and stimulation is good ,they must need some quiet time.You know as the Baby gets older this may become more evident and it may be easier for your son to express it to her in such a way of not offending.If Baby has a routine then it could be expressed to other Gran that baby has a play time then a quiet time .. LOL its all good fun what a lucky little girl to have 2 caring Grans.....
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