Potty Training

My daughter is three years old and is completely potty trained when it comes to urinating.  But, for some reason she only wants to poop in a diaper.  She will hold it and say the poop is coming and cries for a diaper.  If I refuse to put a diaper on her and insist that she sit on the potty, she screams and cries until she poops.  After she poops she is ok, not great, but is ok.  She has on occasion clapped her hands, flushed the toilet and been very proud about her accomplishment and tells me that she will poop in the potty next time.  That it was fun. Other times, it's just ok and insist that I flush the toilet immediatley.  But, by the time she has to go again, it's the same thing all over.  Screaming, crying hysterically, asking for a diaper, until she poops and she is happy she did it. Any ideas about this behavior and if I'm doing the right thing by refusing her the diaper to poop in?

[maggie2359]

I would just keep doing what you are doing, just keep telling her that she is a big girl now and that big girls don't wear diapers anymore.  Has this been going on for a while?  Do you give her a treat or something after she does poop in the potty?

[tiredbuthappy]

i have found it is best to let her continue to ask for a diaper. it will pass with time, and forcing her to poop on the potty will only make it worse.

i did work with one family that had a clever solution. they allowed her to ask for a diaper, but had her sit on the potty with the diaper. when she was done, they would flush the poop down the toilet. after she became comfortable with that, one day they cut a hole in the diaper before putting it on her. she pooped in the diaper like normal, but it fell right into the toilet. she had the comfort and security of the diaper, and quickly got over her fear. after that, there were no more problems.

[Rusty7h4]

She has been asking for a diaper  to poop in for about 3 months, so I decided if she was aware enough to ask me for a diaper to poop in, then it was time to take away the diaper and have her use the potty.  The drama has been going on for about two months.  And yeah, the treats abound.  Thanks for your input.  It's hard not to cave when they sound like they are dying.  But everytime I've held the course, it's worked.  I just don't want to traumatize her.

[Rusty7h4]

Tiredbuthappy,

I will give that a try.  Right now when I have put a diaper on her, she goes to her "special place" in the living room and poops in her diaper while standing up.  It will be interesting to see how she takes to me sitting her on the toilet with a diaper on and then with a hole in it. But, it's worth a try.  Thanks.

[tiredbuthappy]

even if you don't make it to the hole phase, allowing her to use a diaper but asking her to do it in the restroom will reinforce that that is where we go to the bathroom.