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Child Behavior (Expert Forum)
School girls cliques
Answered by
Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D. - Child and Adolescent Psychotherapy, Family Therapy, Crisis Intervention
Harvard Vanguard Medical Associates
This forum is for questions and support regarding child behavior issues such: Child Discipline (behavior management), Normal Child Development, Parent-Child Communications, Social Development
School girls cliques
by Squirbie, Oct 17, 2001 12:00AM
Our 3rd grade girls have become extremely cliqueish. The most "popular" girls say that they are everyone's friends but usually choose each other for activities and exclude others. What suggestions for modifying this behavior can you share with me?
Doctor's Answer
by Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D., Oct 18, 2001 12:00AM
, Oct 18, 2001 12:00AM
To a certain extent, this behavior is quite typical of third graders. Now, if the behavior includes mean-spirited exclusion of others, adults should intervene and help the children learn about how to deal in a sensitive manner with peers. If no misbehavior is involved, let the kids work things out themselves.
Member Comments (2)
by jupiter, Oct 17, 2001 12:00AM
What I do is mix up the group. I will separate the clique and mix in the other girls. Arrange get to know you type activities, interviews and games that somehow fit in with what we are working on for the week. I'm a 2nd & 3rd grade Brownie leader. I've also rewarded the cliquish girls when they accept others into their circle. When I witness exclusions I break up the group without pointing out why. I don't want to alienate the excluded girls any further. I always make sure that if a girls feelings are hurt that I address the issue. In the case of extreem rude or mean behavior they are pulled aside and assigned "homework". Usually to write a paper on the subject and come up with ways to make sure things like that don't continue to happen. This has only happened once. (With my own child) Good luck.
