Sociopathic behavior

[Chris1216]

I don't know if it is because I read too much, but my son seems to be exhibiting alot of the symptoms of a sociopath.  First of all, we have 2 dogs.  One is a medium size year old dog and the other is a small puppy.  The medium dog, he always pulls her tail and paws and steps on her paws or he tries to sit on her.  He does this just to hear her yelp.  That is what is so disturbing.  he hears her yelp and then he will mimick the sound and then try to hurt her again untill I physically pull him off of her.  He has now escalated to punching the poor dog, and the dog is getting closer to actually biting him.  I have tried to punish him every way possible, and nothing works.  I take away everything from him and he could care less.  Its when I take all his things away and ground him that he does it even more because he has almost nothing to do.  And the poor puppy - he was gentle when we first got him, but now he pick him up by the head and throws him onto the floor and he always tries to make sure that the puppy does not land on its feet.
My son is 4 years old.  I see that some of these things he is getting from the TV & Playstation (at grandpa's), but he also has a temper that I cannot control.  My father is the only one that seems to be the one that can sometimes get him to calm down.  I brib him.  His father is not in the picture.
But, my son can be very sweet at times, and he is very protective of me, and he is very much a mama's boy.  I also know that this altogether is so close to what a sociopath is thought to start out like as children, and I am left to wonder, is my child one, or am I just a really paranoid bad mother?

[grub132]

I am no expert in the area of children but do have some experience with the type of personalities you are concerned about. Firstly I think you need to remind yourself that this particular type of personality is quite rare. Your post alerts me to the fact that you are concerned and as a mother myself you immediately search for the answers and a resolution because we want to fix it all, this is natural! Try not to read to much, it can influence our judgement but trust that your instinct is telling you this is obviously not how your child is normally. When my childen were at the age your son is they needed to be guided where animals were concerned, often children think of them as toys! I note the only male figure in his life is his grandfather, yes he is lucky to have this as alot of children have no male figure in there life but it doesn't make up for missing a Father's role. As a mom doing it on your own most of the time it would be very challenging and you must believe you are doing your best, you are not a bad mum. Children often respond to others and seem to test the parent more often, this is quite normal. The behaviour is somewhat agrressive at times from what you describe but it is not fair on your son to pre-judge. On a professional level it is not appropriate and clinically can not be determined that your son has this type of personality as he is just begining to develop. It may be a case teaching self control along with cause and effect, perhaps also looking at finding a consequence that you know will get a response. (finding this can be hard sometimes) You can always seek some professional help with this if you feel it necessary, there is always help. It may be worth your while allowing him to talk about not having a Dad around. In your post it was a little difficult to see if this has already been tried, was dad in the picture when born or not a part of his life at all? This although may seem not an issue for you it may be for him. I hope that this  is of some help. Remember to build on the strengths he and you have! Good luck.

[Amy521]

Why are you letting the kid continually hurt the dog?  Also, how old is your son?

[Agiesmom]

While it is totally unacceptable for anyone to hurt animals, I think that a lot of younger kids are impulsive and don't really have the empathy you may think they should have.  Your son may find the yelp sound to be funny/unusual/interesting and wants to hear it again and is just doing a cause and effect sort of thing, not really grasping that the yelp means pain (even if you tell him it does).  But I would talk to your pediatrician about it.

In the meantime, I would limit the tv and games and I would also keep him away from the dogs.  Can you block the dogs in the living room or kitchen with a gate that you can go over and your son cannot?  Then you can go over and play with them, pet them, give them treats.  Then gradually introduce your son to them again after demonstrating appropriate interaction for several days.  You can say, "You can come in with me to visit the dogs, but you must be gentle."  Then, the first sign that he may grab or hurt in any way, he's out of the room--calmly pick him up and lift him over the gate and tell him, "You must be gentle to visit the dogs."  Maybe start out by only having him give care while being supervised by you--take him into the kitchen and fill the food bowl...then back over the gate.  Maybe he can help you walk them around the block.  But limit the time and supervise every second of it and build up to more time together.  Keep it positive--short and sweet at first.

But, again...talk to your pediatrician--he/she may ask you if there are any other tendencies that can either rule out or confirm a potential problem with your son.