I have been married for 7 years and have 3 children one of which is a step-son. I have had nothing but problems since day one. His mother died when he was 18 months there was a big custody battle between my husband and my step-son's grandmother. I came into the picture and he viewed me as taking his father. I would try everything to get him to like me and nothing worked, he would cause fights with me and my husband by telling lies and my husband would fall for them ever time. Two years ago my husband and I went though something that opened my husband's eyes but he still goes back ever now and then. I have been to hell and back with these problems and think I should get divorce and move on, this mess can not be good for my other children. The only time my husband and I fight its always over our son. The mean problems are he makes up stories about me, he has no respect for me, he only listens when he wants something and he lies all the time. I'm already on medication to help deal with my life but I can't take much more if nothing will change.
His father needs to step in and take more time with him or discipline him. I read one poster on another forum that said she wouldn't marry a man with children. I wouldn't either. It causes problems like this. You only have two real options: Stay with him and his son for better or worse. Or divorce again. Either way you have to start over. Number one by staying with him and accepting his son and demanding that he be disciplined and paid attention tow. Number two by starting a new life without a spouse and as a single mother of three.
I hope things work out for you.
WHAT??? Marrying someone with children does not mean you are doomed to a life of problems and fighting!! Making bad dicisions about your choice of a life partner does. I was a single mother and am getting married in September. My fiance and I do not fight about children. We are both adults with respect for eachother and my son. My son has been raised to have respect for everyone. My son and my fiance have an excellent relationship and they love eachother sooo much you would never know that they are not "real" father and son. When we meet new people they always assume that he is our child together. It makes me very sad to think of where the 3 of us would be right now if he thought to himself that marrying a woman with a child would only cause a life of problems. Dating a single parent can be beneficial to you in many ways.
1. Single parents are not used to thinking of themselves first. They think of others before themselves.
2. Single parents are good listeners. One of the most important things in a marriage.
3. Single parents are appreciative. Everyone wants to be appreciated.
4. Single parents are giving. Even if it is the last doughnut. They will give it to you. They are used to giving it to someone they care about.
5. Single parents are loyal. They have already learned what unconditional love is.
6. Single parents always have something to do. The life of a good mom or dad is never boring.
The list goes on and on. Obviously not every single parent is going to be great. However I think that if you classify all of them as "unmarriable" you may miss out on something great.
No offence. I am just saying that I agreed with someone else. I have been married a long time and my husband is more against divorce than me. I like it that way. If I had to remarry, it would be someone without children. Or, I would rather live on my own. I don't like split families as my family split. I know all about step-children and being one.
I respect your opinion though; it works for you.
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