Tantrums in the middle of the night

My daughter is 5 years old and begins Kindergarten next week.  She is very smart and has always been a wonderful child.  She never had many tantrums in her 2s and 3s, but began having  some during her 4 year.  They always happened only at home and during the day.  We do time-outs, take away special things. We have spanked her when she's screaming and leaves the chair, or her room.  The spanking is so unsatifactory (in results) that we both try to avoid doing it and just keep our voices down (when we can!) and keep repeating that she has to clam down.  Now, I wouldn't be writing just for that, although we have been disturbed with the Doctor Jekyll/Mr Hyde of her personality and have talked to other parents etc.  Last night she had her third tantrum in the middle of the night and these absolutely blow us away.  She use to have occasional "night terrors" that lasted 5-10 min and she wasn't concious of them.  These are like Night terrors to the 10th degree.  She SCREAMS and jumps and hits.  The very first thing I've done is shut the windows!  I'm afraid the police will arrive and ask what we are doing to our child at 1:00 in the morning.  Last night it lasted about 35 min and it was pure hell.  My husband took over as I was just incapable of  handling this outpuring of ANGER.  She had come to my class of Tai Chi with me last night and had been wonderful and her normal patient, sweet self.  She got to bed later than usual (10:00 instead of 8:30)  I remember the books said that night terrors come from being over tired.  Is that what night tantrums come from also?  It's not something we are disciplining her for as she barely seems aware, is irrational (DON'T TALK TO ME!  YOU HAVE NO SLEEVES!), and it's the middle of the night?!  After she has worn herself out, each time she has sobbed in my arms  and gives me a kiss and hug and then goes angellically to her bed.  Finally, I will add that she was adopted from birth.  I only mention it as it's part of her unique Bio.  We are still in touch with both birth parents, although we haven't seen her birth father in a year.  Her birthday was in July and that's the last time we saw her birth mother (always a great visit) and I haven't seen any connection with tantrums or any kind of acting out, and her birth parents' visits.

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

You are witnessing an exacerbation of her night terrors, so continue to handle them as you have in the past - i.e., not as a disciplinary situation. Night terrors occur as a normal part of development, even when children are not overly tired (though being overly tired can contribute, as you have read). It is also not unusual for children of your daughter's age to experience an increase in the frequency and intensity of night terrors as their kindergarten year approaches. This is a very stressful time for children, even when they are, from all appearances, looking forward to school. So keep trying to maintain your equanimity, be supportive and patient. This too shall pass!