Teen Issues

I just wanted a few opinions. I caught my daughter (age 15) with cigerettes for the third time. Mind you, she just got off a grounding this weekend for being caught smoking at school with some other kids. She was grounded for a month, no TV, no computer, no phone, no going out with friends, nothing! I briefly talked to her tonight but told her that her dad and I would talk and let her know what will happen. She said she thought I should do what her friends' mother did (one of the kids at school who was also caught smoking). Her friends' mother made her daughter smoke the entire pack and eat the last cigerette to make her sick. I guess she hasn't smoked since, but I don't really like that idea. Grounding didn't seem to work that well, either.
I did explain to her that I've had family members die horrible deaths due to smoking and that I didn't want to see her go there.
I do understand. I used to smoke. I know how it can make you feel. I also know how difficult it can be to quit!
Sometimes I wonder if addictions can run in families? I've tried to warn my kids about drinking because there's alcoholism on my husband's side and nicotine addictions on both of our sides.

I'm thinking about looking up some things to show her the dangers of smoking. I saw a site on the smoking addiction forum. Does anyone else have any other ideas? I just want her to find more postive ways to deal with stress. She keeps picking things that are harmful. I've suggested she go for a walk, call a friend, take a bubble bath. I don't know what else to say or do! Anybody have any suggestions I haven't thought of? Thanks!

[momma-of-3g1b]

I showed my son pictures of lungs affected by smoking. I googled something like....smoke damaged lung pictures. and if you choose the "images" search in google they show tons of them.. well it creeped him out but, hes only 5 lol!  well it creeped me out too.

Also i bet if you googled effects of smoking there may be a site that shows the horrible quick aging that happens, wrinkles, droopy skin, yellow teeth and all the endless amounts of others side effects. Maybe, because she is 15 and girls tend to be into looks at this age, it may impact her.

there may even be educational videos at the library, maybe some documentaries, where she could see what victoms go through........

well i wish you so much luck....uhg......Im sorry your going through this.

[grammaworries]

call your local hospital and see if they could use a volunteer on the oncology floor. my sister is a nurse , my mother died of c .o.p.d
if that doesn't help at least she knows what her future will look like.
i'll bet she has lovely hair .....well make sure she knows that that pesky chemo will take care of that.
im a smoker and im disgusted with myself. i HAD a beautiful singing voice once.
the sooner she quits the better.
good luck

[April2]

You guys are great!!! :o) Thanks so much! That's all great advice! I'm going to try some of them out! Thanks again, everyone! You helped so much! God bless you all!

[squee27]

Addiction is absolutely genetic. For example, alcoholics are alcoholics for life, whether they quit drinking or not - the "addiction gene" is still there. Someone who has a predisposition for addiction is at a much higher risk of becoming addicted to substances such as nicotine, alcohol, or other drugs.

[FatherOf2]

Well both my parents smoke, and my father is an alcoholic, I have picked up the smoking as did my sister, we know the damage it causes and i must admit the thought of my children smoking in the future is sickening, but its an addictions i cant kick, i've spent years trying.

My advise though if you really want to make the point, isnt to scare her, its more than likely a "fit-in" thing, i know its how alot of people i know got started, it helps to fit in, you cant stand with the smokers without smoking. I personnally think you handled it right, you first tried a punishment which shows it wrong, but then you treated her like an adult and spoke to her, reasoning with you child will help, she may choose to ignore you but keep cracking at it and you'll get through. Show her the benefits of not smoking, the extra money, the better lifestyle etc, dont show her the horrors of smoking because they can all be put back with "It doesnt happen to everyone" whereas the not smoking means more money "to everyone".