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Avatar universal

Toddler boys kissing

I'm currenly in an uncomfortable situation because i have a very good friend with two boys (2 1/2 yr & 4 yr) and both are very affectionate with my 20 month old. They are always hugging him and kissing him and my son is starting to do the same back. I feel my son is learning from them that hugging and kissing boys is okay.  I understand at this age the children are just expressing affection but i don't feel boys need to be affectionate with others boys. They can play together, give high fives, and or handshakes. But the kissing makes me uncomfortable. I don't know how to approach this situation with the other parents or my son so this behavior stops.
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Avatar universal
why are you even worried about your son kissing other boys? sexuality doesn't show up in children until much later, and this kind of contact is good for reaffirming emotional bonds. Boys need just as much emotional support as girls do, and the affection they show each other is just fine
Helpful - 2
377493 tn?1356502149
I have a 19 month old that is also super affectionate.  With both myself and my husband (his father) and everyone else.  He loves to give kisses, including the kids he is in daycare with (boys and girls).  To start with the germs issue.  I can see your concern, however, if your child is anything like mine, they are constantly passing toys back and forth, those toys are going in the mouth etc.  I guess I am of the belief that those germs are going to be there, and it's not really possible to have them around other kids and avoid it.  So, I do my best, and don't worry about it anymore (and you are talking to the biggest worrywart ever when it comes to my son).

As for affection with other boys...remember that at this age there is no sexuality involved. It's affection, pure and simple.  I personally don't think it's anything to be concerned about.  I had someone tell me that giving him kisses was teaching him innappropriate sexual behavior.  I'm glad I didn't listen because I have a sweet affectionate little boy who is well socialized and normal. And it sounds like you do to.  You worry,...we all do.  But I'm going to say...good job momma!  Sounds to me like your raising a little sweetheart.  Stop it if you must, but honestly...I don't think there is anything to be concerned about.
Helpful - 1
Avatar universal
What is wrong with you let your children grow and make their own decisions stop trying to make them into what you want them to be and let the smallest innocent things seem bad if you tell your son that it's not okay to show affection then what kind of parent does that make you i bet it if it was a little girl you wouldn't care but you seem more afraid that your son might be gay and you don't like that witch is wrong that's your baby love them and let them know it's okay to be whatever they want because you love them and that's all that matters just guide them and let them know there are boundaries and what's acceptable and not acceptable don't let them go up to every kid they see and kiss them but that's your close friend you shouldn't feel "uncomfortable" or scared it's natural for young kids to grow and explore and find things out on their own
Helpful - 0
19676114 tn?1482297442
your children are most likely gay and that's okay. As they get older you will witness more than just kissing. I would recommend buying a bigger house and giving them separate rooms. Or simply just lay down some ground rules and get them to church
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
why are you even worried about your son kissing other boys? sexuality doesn't show up in children until much later, and this kind of contact is good for reaffirming emotional bonds. Boys need just as much emotional support as girls do, and the affection they show each other is just fine
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Children that young copy what they see. They don't have any concepts about male and female at that age. You kiss your child and it is a positive thing, so they do what you do to them as a positive thing too. It's all healthy; most all children do that.
Helpful - 0
689528 tn?1364135841
I would just say "we aren't kissing, lots of germies"! If I were you though, I wouldn't worry too much about it. Babies and toddlers are quite sexless and don't really understand things like that, they just know that you love them so you give em a nice kiss and they are showing that they really like your son. It's sweet but yes, pretty germy!!
Helpful - 0
535822 tn?1443976780
well they most certainly will be passing on any germs and they are at school your baby will get every virus going if the excessive kissing carries on ,I suggest you use it as an excuse to cool it with the kissing.the other  parents will understand that ..
Helpful - 0
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