Toilet Training

Our son turned 4 years old at the end of October. He has developmental delays in fine/gross motor and language areas. He is still not toilet trained. He has shown interest in the toilet but just sits on it and never does anything. His diaper is dry every morining so he has good bladder control. I am not sure if he really knows how to go (relieve himself). My wife and I have been bending over backwards for 6 months trying to get him to go to no avail. We offer candies, encouragement, rewards, consequences  and nothing works!!! Should we continue with this method or back off and wait to see if he shows more interest on his own. It is at the point where we are rather embarrassed that he still has a diaper on. HELP!!

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

Dear Jon,

It's generally the wise thing to rely on development taking its course, and the child's own interest taking hold. I would wait this out. If things don't improve over the next six months or so, you always have the choice of dispensing with diapers. This sometimes pushes youngsters over that last hurdle. But I wouldn't do it now.

[JENISE RUSH]

TOILET TRAING I BELEIVE TAKES ON ITS OWN COURSE AND CHILREN ARE READY WHEN THEY ARE READY.REWARDS CAN BACKFIRE BECOMING BRIBES .HAVE YOU TRIED HAVING DAD BE AN EXAMPLE ? HAVE YOU READ KID BOOKS TO HIM ON THE SUBJECT THERE ARE MANY OF THOSE IF YOU BUY ONE MAKE SURE THE BOOK IS DESIGNED FOR A 3-4 YEAR OLD NOT A TWO YEAR OLD . INSTEAD OF FOCUSING ON HIM TO POTTY JUST FOCUS ON POTTYS AND OTHERS WHO POTTY BE POSITIVE SEND MESSAGES LIKE "I KNOW SOMEDAY IT WILL BE YOUR TURN TO USE THE TOILET "INSTEAD OF "NAGGING"HIM ASKING HIM IF HE NEEDS TO IF HES NOT READY THOUGH AT ALL I WOULD BACK OFF COMPLETELY DROPPING IT BECAUSE IT MAY BE THAT THERE IS JUST TO MUCH EMPHASIS ON THE BATHROOM ISSUES LEAVING HIM FEELING PRESSURED WICH COULD BE LEADING HIM TO FEEL POTTY TRAING IS NEGATIVE .PLEASE DONT STRESS TOO MUCH IM SURE BEFORE LONG HE WILL BE OVER THAT HURDLE ONTO THE NEXT .

[dd1985]

A related discussion, toilet training was started.

[kazz22]

A related discussion, tiolet on floor was started.