Unanswered Questions About 4 yr. Old Boys's Agression

Please, refer back to the question I posted 01/19. I thank you for your suggestions thus far. But I ask you once again,because we are concerned parents. What should we do when he makes threats that he wants to get a gun and shoot one of his older playmates. We know he is angry and frustrated. However, considering the seriousness of such a threat, is time-out enough?
Should he be spanked? Soap in the mouth? Also, as I asked you before, could any of this be related to his speech articulation problems?

thanks in advance for your help and advise

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

Dear Mr. Boyd,

Time out is a sufficient, and effective, response to threats of physical aggression. Spanking or using soap may well discourage the behavior, but will also very likely bring about an unintended side effect - namely, an increase in your son's aggressive tendencies.

Relative to the speech difficulties, these can increase a young child's frustration, no doubt about it. At the same time, such difficulties are probably not particularly influential relative to the types of behavior that worry you.

[belinda]

Is that all you have to say about this particular concern? What about suggestions. I feel for this couple; I have the same problem with my 4 year old. He is now going through evaluation because he has been "expelled" from 2 pre-k programs in one year. The reason: aggressive behavior. When my son was still a fetus, his brain was developing a cyst. The doctors told me not to worry that it would get so small it would not matter. Now I wonder if it did. No doctor I have been to can offer ANY advice. I wanted to have my son tested for lead exposure but the doctor refused. His answer was ritalin. Sorry, but not for a 4 year old. Whatever you do, do not resort to washing his mouth with soap or hitting him. Your 4 yr-old does not understand his own anger enough to know it is wrong.