Unhappiness at being an Only Child

My daughter is almost five and she seems to be very unhappy at being an Only Child.  She has many friends and I try to arrange play dates at least four times a week but this doesn't seem to satisfy her need to be with other children.  She asks constantly to have a friend to play with and when she leaves the home of friends who have siblings she sobs because she has to go home alone.  We live with my husband and my parents so there are almost always four adults in the house with her but she seems terribly lonely for other children.  What can I do to help ease her unhappiness?

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

Dear Nancy,

It sounds like you are trying to be responsive and reasonable, arranging time for your daughter to be with other children (in addition to the time she will spend in school). Some of the time, of course, she will need to learn to occupy herself at home, without the company of peers. I don't think you should place an undue burden on yourself - you are already acting in a responsible fashion.

As your daughter proceeds in school, you can also arrange for her involvement in after-school programs, which can be primarily recreational in nature. The same holds true for her participation in other organized pursuits (e.g., Brownies/Girl Scouts, athletics) that can offer her opportunities for interaction with peers.

[Mojo38]

I am 38 years old and a single mother to a 7 year old little boy who is also a single child like I was.  He is just the oppposite, he always says how glad he is that he doesn't have brothers or sisters that he has to share his toys with.  He has many friends and is quite outgoing.  Making playdates is a good idea.  Things are different now than when I was a kid.  It used to be you would just walk out your front door  and there would be a group of kids playing kick the can on the block or some other group game and a kid could just join in but now with so many working parents you just don't see as many kids outside with free time on their hands.  Maybe keep bringing up the benifits of being an "only" to your child.  I loved being an only child too.  I know wo many people that "Have" to have people around them because they are not comfortable being alone with themselves.  Your child will do just fine.  I didn't turn out so bad:)  Mojo38