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child abuse

recently my child told me she had been abused she is 5 years old .I informed the police and social workers she had a medical exam which reveled that their was signs of abuse ,rectum abuse but they wasnt sure of what has actually has happened.My daughter has not showed any signs mental or phsyical nor complained of pain and which later denied what she had said.My daughter has always suffered from constipation and hasbeen known to spend long periods of time in the loo and i have caught her putting her fingers up her bum  also wiping poo on the toilet roll.I  am very worried and concerned that what the doctor has noticed could be something to do with what she has been doing and mistaking it for acctuall abuse or that she may have a bowl problem.I am hoping it could be one of these and she has not been abused.please help i just want my baby girl to not have suffered this it hurts me really bad
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Avatar universal
Hi there. So I want to ease your mind. As you might have read in another post of mine, I myself wsa a victim of sexual abuse for 11 years and it began at a very young age for me. I would like to agree with daycaretrouble. It is instinct for a child to attempt to help themselves when they are in pain. It seems quite reasonable for her to do something like trying to "pull" a bm  out if she can not push it out. However, also like daycaretrouble said, keep a close watch on your daughter. No parent wants to believe that anyone we entrust our kids with would hurt them, but it happens and it happens everyday. Think back on how she told you about it. Did she use words that she wouldn't know to use had someone not educated her about it. Did she say that she was "abused" or did she say that someone hurt her? Have you talked with her about people touching her in places they shouldn't? It could very well be that she was educated about this topic and maybe was told that it hurts and thus using her little mind to put pain and abuse together. My advice would be to keep track of who is watching her (even if it's daddy...no offense). Sometimes we are blind to what is right beneath our eyes. I would call the doctor and see if her trying to pull a bm out could have caused the damage to her body and he saw. A little info on abuse though: for an abused child, it is very normal for a child to retract a claim if he/she feels scared that the person doing it will find out. She will begin to act different, however, if she is abused. It may not necessarily be bad changes. She could become overly affectionate. She might also withdraw from people. There are so many signs to suggest abuse. No one knows your child better than you do. Good luck and post again if you need.
Oh and it could have been the walls she wiped the poo on....you're lucky it's the toilet paper :)
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Avatar universal
talk to your doctor again and voice your concerns.  since your daughter has constipation.  keep a log of her bowel movements and if possible details of the stool (formed ?, size, amount, any blood present) and also keep track of how many days she is going without a bm.  As a 5 yr old when she is hurting because of constipation,  it is just our survival instinct to want to get it out any way we can, for her it might be her finger.  I am a nurse and have seen several adults do this.  also watch her diet  try to increase water, high fiber foods/ snacks,  back off on dairy  and cheeses.   I can see why a child her age could say such a thing considering the problems she is having down there,  but dont let your guard down either.  It is so frustrating to see a child report a crime and the parents do nothing.  I admire you for taking your child to the physician for an exam, and for also being open to other peoples advise.   watch closely who your child is in contact with and any behavior changes. at her age,  you would probably look for regressive behavior like bed wetting, thumb sucking, acting out or becoming distant.   good luck!  
p.s.  the poop on the toilet paper- probably just wiping it off her hands, and what better place!
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