child promblems

hello i need some advice, i have a five year old daughter, and it start last thursday the school informed me that my daughter was asking boys of her own age to wee out side so she can watch, i have sent her to bed each night and explianed to her this is not good behavoir, she has done it all week and keeps asking boys to go to the toilet to go to the toilet so she can see, she also said  if you dont do this you can not go to my house to play, the school have expressed there concerns and are writting a daily log, and she has also ripped a boys pair of trousers with an other girl, today she touched a boy between the legs and asked him to do the same, i am very concerned and dont understand why this is happening, she goes to school all day then an after school club mixing with older and same age children, she is an only child please could you advise me on this as i do not no where to turn,

[sarasejb]

curiosity to some extent is normal but she needs to know that it is inappropriate to "touch" and look.  We had a similar issue with my neice who is about 8 and we explained to her that it was wrong but the only way to get her to stop was to explain to her that people can go to jail for that. I know it seems harsh but she understands that she doesn't want to go there.  Or, maybe try explaining to her that if she keeps doing it then the other kids might not want to play with her because they'll be too afraid she might ask them to do that again and then she wont have any friends.  also ask her why she wants to know about it, maybe there are questions you can address that will stop her curiosity.  My neice started sticking things up her butt & it was resolved by telling her about how poop is poison.  Maybe she got the idea from a friend, it doesnt hurt to ask, just tell her you wont get mad at her  you just want to know.  as a mom youll find the right words, she's your child just try to figure out what it is she is trying to know so she doent have to go to the other kids.

[SL345]

Ask her where she got the idea to do this. Has she seen something (perhaps at the after school program) or has anyone touched her or asked her to touch them. Is there any nudity at home? If so, cover up and close doors. I would suggest doing what may seem counter-intuitive. Instead, of trying to get this out of her mind or suppressing it, try to open it up for discussion. Explore it with her. Ask if she has seen a boys' penis. If so, ask her to describe what she's saw, what she did, how she felt. Ask her if she has any questions about what she saw or what she's like to see. Tell her you can help her get information from books and other places to answer her questions. Ask her how she thinks it makes the other kids feel when she tells them this. Tell her you want to her her to stay out of trouble and she could get into trouble if she keeps doing this because it's against the rules at school and it's against your rules to do this. Keep talking to her about it in a non-punitive way.