dandy walker syndrome and being dependent

My daughter, Allison, has Dandy Walker Syndrome. Along with this diagnosis comes the fact that she is almost totally dependent(while she is not retarded) on nurses and myself for daily care. She cannot speak as a "normal" four year old does. My questions are as follow: How much stress does this put on her? How do I ease this stress for her without taking away her sense of accomplishment? I have tried various forms of discipline, of which that seems to work are, taking her away from the situation and away from others. Time-out is a better term. She has never been a child who enjoys toys...she has hypersensitivity in her hands...instead she enjoys human(skin-on-skin) contact. I have found that I am sometimes a hover-mother. How do I get passed this enough for her to get the most out of "normal" learning experiences that other children have? She used to grind her teeth, which a pediatric dentist has told me is a sign of stress. These episodes are fewer and farther between, but she has found other aspects of showing stress or frustration...such as spitting.
She is in an early childhood developmental school. This school has "peer" models of other children who do not have any "health problems". She appears to enjoy this excursion each day. This is what has brought to my attention the fact that i need to address these issues.

thank you for your time and expertise.

sincerly and whole-heartedly,
mandy wallace

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

Dear Ms. Wallace,

As you know, Dandy Walker Syndrome is a congenital malformation of the brain, and it is often associated with other central nervous system problems.

This condition requires treatment directed toward whatever anomalies typify it with a partcular child. I am not going to attempt a direct answer to your question, but instead am referring you to a web site sponsored by the National Institute of Health's National Institute of Neurological Disorders and Stroke:

http://www.ninds.nih.gov/patients/disorder/dandywak/dandy-walker.htm.

I hope you find the information on the site helpful

[mandy wallace]

I thank you for your time and advice. I found the site very helpful.

Truly,

Mandy Wallace