first child reaction to newly born child

[psyckell]

I just recently had a baby and this is my second but my concern is my first child who is five and i don't know how he is taking the new baby in the house.  When the new baby crys he puts hands over his ears and says i can't take this and can we give the new baby away and he can come back when he is older.  But when the crying stops he is fine and blows the baby kisses.  But he drew a picture of all four of us (mum, dad, him and new baby) in a heart and drew himself again outside the heart holding on to string attached to heart.  

what would this picture mean and is there anything i can do to make it easier for him?

[SL345]

I think your son is saying in his drawing and possibly in other ways that he has mixed feelings about his new brother. One the one hand, he loves him and welcomes him into the family. And, other the other hand, he hates his crying - it may hurt his ears (does he have any sensory sensitivities to loud noises or other sensitivities?). Since he has a creative bent, it might be nice to make a book with him on the pluses and minuses of having a baby brother. There are some great children's books on the birth of a new sibling, as well. Maybe he could have a special job to help with his brother. And, maybe during these early years regular play dates outside of the home to give him a break would make sense. Maybe he could talk to some of his friends with younger siblings to commiserate. Just a few thoughts that might be helpful.

[smekat]

Your poor son has no idea how to relate how he feels. There is only so much you can do. Try to encourage your son to help, get the wetwipes, sit next to you and hold the bottle, let him hold the baby.
When baby wakes first deal with your five year old... put a film on for him in another room, or take him to the kitchen and make him milk and cookies, give him stuff to paint and draw... that way baby crying means nice stuff for him.
Remember this little boy was YOUR baby and will still want some baby cuddles with mummy. Try to do something with just you 2 everyday. small things like read a bedtime story... etc.
Also for him the baby crying is a sign that all attention will leave him and go to the baby. Always have something ready to give or do with your son when baby wakes up... you could be nursing baby and playing snap, or drawing with your son.
Make the crying time fun.. and your son will be fine.