four yearold bad behavior

My 4 year old grandaughter some days not every day has a problem with nap time at pre school.  She has a little speech problem but when it's nap time she gets angry and hit herself in the head and spits??  It's not everyday
and we at at our  witts end what to do. She will be going to kindergarden this fall and is in speech class now once
a week. Does she need professional help?

[specialmom]

Hm.  Well, a speech delay can be very frustrating for sure.  It can interfere with all kinds of things in a child's life from peer interaction to how a child expresses emotions to self esteem.  Good for the parents for recognizing that getting help with speech is important and having her in speech classes.  I'd practice all the things she does in speech therapy at home as well.  I am sure that they gave you things to do but we really liked the making faces to music and freeze game and various other games.  I got a cd called "speechercize" which is really fun oral motor exercise to music plus sounds to work on speech.  I got it off of the Internet and I recommend it.

Now, her emotions could be just because she is upset and has a hard time expressing it.  She is still young so keep that in mind.  But she seems to be a little immature in regards to how she handles her emotions.  This is not saying anything bad about her . . . many kids are like this at 4.  What I would do is to work with her on expressing herself.  Give her the words to use and role play how to act when one is upset.  Show her more appropriate ways of showing anger, being frustrated, or being sad.  She can use words that you give her to use and tell a grown up, she can take deep breaths, she can give herself a tight hug, she can open and close her fists firmly, she can count to 10 or she can go to a designated cool down spot.  All are preferable to a melt down.  Also check out books on emotions at the library in the children's section.  They use kid language and express it in a way that she will relate to and maybe be better able to use the words she needs to tell how she feels rather than show it.  

I'd consider if she has a summer birthday and turns 5 . . . with a speech issue and a bit of immaturity ---------- frankly, I'd give her another year before kindergarten.  She'd already be on the young side and there is a huge difference between a just turned 5 year old and a just turned or about to turn 6 year old.  You want her to start her school experience off on the best foot possible and that extra year could do wonders for her.

One other thing.  How are her other motor skills------- either gross or fine?  Does she or did she trip a lot?  She's a girl and they are usually good with scissors and writing . . . so she probably is.  What about pumping a swing or riding a bike?  I ask because sometimes a speech issue can be related to the sensory system and something called "motor planning" is involved.  This is part of the nervous system and has to do with how the brain processes things and sends the messages back out.  My son actually has sensory integration disorder.  Regulation is part of sensory and involves a child's system becoming overwhelmed and then they don't handle things well.  You didn't say much at all to remind me of sensory. . . but my son's first signs to a preschool teacher were speech issues and tripping.  Just something to think about.  And don't panic, my son does occupational therapy and is doing fantastic!  If you google sensory and think it is a possibility an occupational therapist evaluates and treats it (and I have about a million suggestions.).  

Wishing you and your grand daughter lots of luck!

[benjimom]

Yes, how bad are the speech issues.  Is she going to be on an IEP and getting some extra help in Kindergarten?  she will need it, esp if she has speech delays. I think speech delays lead to a lot of issues if not dealt with and her kicking may be her way of dealing with her problems with communication.