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is my 4 year old developmentally behind?
I have an awesome 4 year old girl, but im beginning to wonder if she might be a little behind. She can't recognize any colors or shapes, and has trouble answering yes or no questions (just says yes to everything). She wont tell anyone her name, not even me.The only people that can understand her are me and my husband. She is VERY clumsy. She can't pedal a trike and when I try to help her and show her how she screams like someone is killing her and says it hurts. She also hates wearing clothes, if I leave her alone for a short time she almost always gets naked. I do try to teach her at home while we play by telling her what color/ shape everything is and I have tried flash cards to. She chews and licks everything. She also has been self harming, hitting her self in the head, banging her head on the ground, and biting herself. Let me know what you think, thanks
They are actually very different. Kids with aspergers often have sensory symptoms in fact it is common. Aspergers or autism is the primary diagnosis with sensory being comorbid to that. Sensory alone looks different than autism/aspergers. There are two different modes to why a child has the issues with speech and social skills problems with autism/ aspergers verses sensory. Sensory is processing and nervous system missignals. By doing much heavy work (the term used for the activities a person does to work on their sensory system), the sensory system regulates. And many of the symptoms improve or go away.
When diagnosed, sensory and aspergers were two very separate things according to the three person team that diagnosed my son. developmental pediatricians are the best to explain why. My son did not fall into the diagnosis of aspergers but obviously did for sensory. And for us, it was the right diagnosis as speech is now perfect with my son, he plays sports, has straight A's, plays the violin, has a circle of friends, etc. Through our OT, we were able to work on his sensory symptoms and life dramatically improved.
For your issue with sounds, they do therapeutic listening-- have you ever looked into that? All these things that they do are pretty interesting such as brushing for skin issues. My son had several of these--- and the brushing all but eliminated them.
Anyway, that's just my thoughts to what you wrote. :>) I'm truly amazed at all the things they know now and approaches they take to help. We've seen such amazing improvement that it really gives me more hope for the future for all kids who fall outside of the box. They can dramatically help them which is wonderful. All the best to you and your son!
When diagnosed, sensory and aspergers were two very separate things according to the three person team that diagnosed my son. developmental pediatricians are the best to explain why. My son did not fall into the diagnosis of aspergers but obviously did for sensory. And for us, it was the right diagnosis as speech is now perfect with my son, he plays sports, has straight A's, plays the violin, has a circle of friends, etc. Through our OT, we were able to work on his sensory symptoms and life dramatically improved.
For your issue with sounds, they do therapeutic listening-- have you ever looked into that? All these things that they do are pretty interesting such as brushing for skin issues. My son had several of these--- and the brushing all but eliminated them.
Anyway, that's just my thoughts to what you wrote. :>) I'm truly amazed at all the things they know now and approaches they take to help. We've seen such amazing improvement that it really gives me more hope for the future for all kids who fall outside of the box. They can dramatically help them which is wonderful. All the best to you and your son!
Specialmom I have to say I do not see any differences between Asperger and sensory disorder...
I thought sensory problems were just that: sensory problems. But in this post you also add delay in speech and social skills problems. That is how I define the basics of Asperger.
As an adult, my main problem is actually not my diminished social skills (I am not the most social person that's for sure but I have learned to adapt to the neurotypical world). My main problems are sensory (smells, sounds). My son is the most affectionate little boy, always hugging us and the cats but yes he is Asperger.
I thought sensory problems were just that: sensory problems. But in this post you also add delay in speech and social skills problems. That is how I define the basics of Asperger.
As an adult, my main problem is actually not my diminished social skills (I am not the most social person that's for sure but I have learned to adapt to the neurotypical world). My main problems are sensory (smells, sounds). My son is the most affectionate little boy, always hugging us and the cats but yes he is Asperger.
Good luck. Make sure she gets all the therapy needed and love your daughter, she will be fine.
"BTW, ecologic, did you know that Asperger's syndrome has now been removed from the DSM as a diagnosis and those who were formerly considered to have Asperger's now just are "on the spectrum" instead of diagnosed with a specific disorder? Interesting. "
I know... but I don't really care. Nor do the psychologists around here: both my son and I were diagnosed Asperger right after the DSM 5 was passed. I think it was changed for insurance purposes and to accept more kids in state programs. Asperger children in my state used to be allowed to be in sociabilization classes for 1 year from 3 to 4 in the school system, now they should be allowed to have the classes from 3 to 6 like classical autistic kids (in theory).
I know... but I don't really care. Nor do the psychologists around here: both my son and I were diagnosed Asperger right after the DSM 5 was passed. I think it was changed for insurance purposes and to accept more kids in state programs. Asperger children in my state used to be allowed to be in sociabilization classes for 1 year from 3 to 4 in the school system, now they should be allowed to have the classes from 3 to 6 like classical autistic kids (in theory).
Went to a new doctor today. He is referring us to a group of behavioral and development doctors in McKay hospital. He said this may just be a temporary period she's going threw, but there are certainly enough concerns that we Need to make sure shes ok. he also talked about taking her to a therapist.
Please keep us informed. My son is not on the spectrum by the way. Sensory is totally separate from autism although some kids have comorbid or overlapping sensory issues. My son also did a ton of spinning and arm flapping. This is a form of something called stimming. Sensory kids also do this as it is a form of trying to self sooth. rocking is another that many kids do. Whether your daughter is on the spectrum and has sensory (as you clearly wrote of some hallmark signs) --- or she just has sensory, a am so pleased your are seeing a new doctor to help sort it out. An occupational therapist referral, a speech evaluation and perhaps a developmental pediatrician all would be helpful. Please come back and let us know what tomorrow's appt. brings. peace
After looking online It all looks a little more clear and i had no idea some of her regular behavior we wernt concerned about could also be symptoms of something bigger, like arm flapping, giving answers that have nothing to do with questions, spinning to calm herself down, and inappropriate laughing. We go to a different doctor tomorrow. Hopefully he can help us with this.
The harnesses arnt really that bad, its really more like a sling you put the baby's feet into with a vest attached that holds the baby's hips in place. Its a common problem in first born girls, im not sure why
She was held all the time as a baby, even though she was in harness she had everyone wanting to touch her and hold her. When she was in the nicu we were there everyday.
kyky, I didn't read all your posts very carefully and went back through to see if she spent her infancy in an orphanage. Her behaviors are very similar to children I have known from foreign orphanages who are adopted at about the age of a year or so.
I was startled to see that she was apparently clamped into some kind of a harness her first year. During that time, was she held at all or did she have to remain immobilized with little human touch?
She has all the symptoms of a child with attachment disorder - you might want to google that and consider that.
I was startled to see that she was apparently clamped into some kind of a harness her first year. During that time, was she held at all or did she have to remain immobilized with little human touch?
She has all the symptoms of a child with attachment disorder - you might want to google that and consider that.
I agree with both SM and ecologic, and believe that sensory issues are also somewhere on the autism spectrum. Autism and autistic-like disorders can be so confusing and conflicting.
BTW, ecologic, did you know that Asperger's syndrome has now been removed from the DSM as a diagnosis and those who were formerly considered to have Asperger's now just are "on the spectrum" instead of diagnosed with a specific disorder? Interesting.
BTW, ecologic, did you know that Asperger's syndrome has now been removed from the DSM as a diagnosis and those who were formerly considered to have Asperger's now just are "on the spectrum" instead of diagnosed with a specific disorder? Interesting.
Actually in my area, you can sign kids up for social skills classes and groups without any type of referral. google your area to find what your options are!
The more you describe her, the more I think she is somewhere on the spectrum. I would take her to another pediatrician and mention that her cousin has Asperger. The pediatrician should refer you to a state pedo-pychologist to evaluate for autism spectrum.
Does she go to day care? She probably would benefit from sociability classes, don't you think? I believe you do not need a diagnosis for that. Just contact your school district and they'll test her with their own tests and decide if the courses can benefit her and how many courses she should have per week.
Does she go to day care? She probably would benefit from sociability classes, don't you think? I believe you do not need a diagnosis for that. Just contact your school district and they'll test her with their own tests and decide if the courses can benefit her and how many courses she should have per week.
The only way she plays with dolls is she takes them out, sits them down and says I love you so much, your a good girl, laughs and walks away. She is verrry loving. Always wants kisses and hugs. We even had to make a rule that she can't have kisses and hugs at dinner so she should actually sit down and eat.
Well, social skills issues are also another issue with sensory kids. It's more if she is able to show affection to you and your husband, show empathy to you and others, keep eye contact with you, etc.
When you describe what she did at a birthday party, that's sensory. Her system was overloaded--- the hands over the ears, the inability to sit and enjoy it, the wandering. All are a sensory response.
does she rock a baby doll, make a stuffed dog go ruff ruff, anything like that?
When you describe what she did at a birthday party, that's sensory. Her system was overloaded--- the hands over the ears, the inability to sit and enjoy it, the wandering. All are a sensory response.
does she rock a baby doll, make a stuffed dog go ruff ruff, anything like that?
She acts afraid of kids. When she sees people (except me and my husband) she stares at them like shes studying them and doesn't want to talk to them even if she knows them. Last time she went to a birthday party she wouldn't play with anyone, all she did was walk around with her hands over her ears looking at things. She wont play with kids. She wont play pretend, if you try to play pretend with her she just looks at you like your crazy, laughs at you and walks away.
I agree that this sounds like autism. My daughter has autism and had many of the same behaviors at 4 years of age too. The biggest indicator of autism that I see is the speech difficulty. Definitely speak to a developmental pediatrician and start getting her evaluated. This may take some time. Meanwhile speak to her regular pediatrician and get a referral for occupational and speech therapy. You do not need a diagnosis to start these therapies. Good luck!
How social is she? does she do pretend play? Those are key questions.
In truth, the things mentioned are also direct signs of sensory (including the one that rockrose doesn't think is sensory. :<) That is something that they check for with sensory on the evaluation as that involved the organization of thought in the brain/processing to have receptive language and expressive language skills).
Your pediatrician really seems to have missed the mark with your daughter. With everything that you've mentioned---- from her birth issues until now, I can't believe he's ever brushed you off! Very irresponsible. I'd flatly change doctors.
Now, husband and wives do not always agree. I've got a good friend in this situation. My husband was always on board and let me take the lead on what we did about our son--- but my friend's husband was not like this. She finally said "too bad" and did what she needed to do to get help for her child. This is a situation in which your husband will thank you later. Clearly, something is amiss here and your daughter needs/deserves help. Maybe the doctor is doing nothing because he senses your husband's attitude. Yes, your daughter has been through a lot but to be her best self, finding the right things to help her is essential. She deserves that!!
I'd contact the local school system. I'd consider asking around with people you know with kids what pediatrician they use. Set up an appt. and take her. And this is just me, but I'd not ASK my husband. I'd tell him as I go. I'm a mama pit bull when it comes to giving my kids what I need. And they really can do things to help a child. There doesn't need to be a name or diagnosis--- just treatment.
Occupational Therapy would help with many things you mention as well as speech. I'm going to recommend a CD that we used with our son called 'speechercize". It helps with oral muscles for talking. An occupational therapist would help with the motor planning issues with language and the speech pathologist would work on all areas related to that as well. An OT would help with her fine and gross motor issues as well and also problem solving with things like self soothing when upset so she doesn't hit herself.
good luck
In truth, the things mentioned are also direct signs of sensory (including the one that rockrose doesn't think is sensory. :<) That is something that they check for with sensory on the evaluation as that involved the organization of thought in the brain/processing to have receptive language and expressive language skills).
Your pediatrician really seems to have missed the mark with your daughter. With everything that you've mentioned---- from her birth issues until now, I can't believe he's ever brushed you off! Very irresponsible. I'd flatly change doctors.
Now, husband and wives do not always agree. I've got a good friend in this situation. My husband was always on board and let me take the lead on what we did about our son--- but my friend's husband was not like this. She finally said "too bad" and did what she needed to do to get help for her child. This is a situation in which your husband will thank you later. Clearly, something is amiss here and your daughter needs/deserves help. Maybe the doctor is doing nothing because he senses your husband's attitude. Yes, your daughter has been through a lot but to be her best self, finding the right things to help her is essential. She deserves that!!
I'd contact the local school system. I'd consider asking around with people you know with kids what pediatrician they use. Set up an appt. and take her. And this is just me, but I'd not ASK my husband. I'd tell him as I go. I'm a mama pit bull when it comes to giving my kids what I need. And they really can do things to help a child. There doesn't need to be a name or diagnosis--- just treatment.
Occupational Therapy would help with many things you mention as well as speech. I'm going to recommend a CD that we used with our son called 'speechercize". It helps with oral muscles for talking. An occupational therapist would help with the motor planning issues with language and the speech pathologist would work on all areas related to that as well. An OT would help with her fine and gross motor issues as well and also problem solving with things like self soothing when upset so she doesn't hit herself.
good luck
I have mentioned my concerns about that possibility last year, because she does do alot of the same things as my nephew ( he has aspurgers) and the pediatrician was very dismissive. He said she looks people in the eye so shes not autistic. But her symptoms have got much worse sense then.
No to concern you but everything you are describing are things of children that are on the autistic spectrum. I don't say she is on the spectrum (I am not a pedo-psy and that is not enough info to make a diagnosis) but definitively raise these concerns to your pediatrician, and if he/she had nothing to recommendation, go see another pediatrician.
My main concern would be her language skills.
My main concern would be her language skills.
kyky, your husband's reaction is fairly typical of dad's typical reactions. I think men in general allow for a lot more variation in "normal" than mothers allow for.
I agree with SM - sounds like sensory issues to me.
The one thing that doesn't sound sensory is her inability to answer a direct question. Have you role-played that with her? I wonder if making a game of how to respond to questions might be helpful for her.
Also, many kids her age respond pretty well to a two part choice. Rather than "would you like a cookie", how about "would you like a cookie or would you like grapes". Are you too hot or are you too cold. Do you want to watch TV or would you rather play outside.
Best wishes. I do think she would benefit from an evaluation.
I agree with SM - sounds like sensory issues to me.
The one thing that doesn't sound sensory is her inability to answer a direct question. Have you role-played that with her? I wonder if making a game of how to respond to questions might be helpful for her.
Also, many kids her age respond pretty well to a two part choice. Rather than "would you like a cookie", how about "would you like a cookie or would you like grapes". Are you too hot or are you too cold. Do you want to watch TV or would you rather play outside.
Best wishes. I do think she would benefit from an evaluation.
Thank you soooo much for your advice. Its very encouraging to hear how good your son is doing.i have looked up spd, and it really sounds like her. A back ground on my little girl, she was not an early baby but was still a little small for a full term baby 5 lbs 2oz. she had hypoglycemia as a baby and spent 1 1/2 months in the nicu because of it. Eventually we took her home when they put her on meds to control it. She also had hip dysphasia so she was in a harness in the frog position until she was about 11 months. As of today she is vary healthy with the exception of celiac disease and being under wait for her age. My husband doesn't see anything wrong with her behavior, he just says "well if i couldnt move for the first year of my life and had as many problems as she had I'd have a hard time to, besides i dont really want to a bunch of specialists again when shes prob just behind a year." anytime anyone has any concerns about her development he gets very defensive and says "well shes had a lot of problems ok, so shes doing fine."
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