my 4 year old watches a scary film now hes terrified day and night

[worrymum]

My 4 year old son recently stopped at
his grandparents house with his older
stepbrother and ended up wanting to watch a film with
the older boys (9yrs) he did so and
this ended up being
A horror...ever since he's come home he
won't leave my side day or night and if I try
And make him go the toilet or fetch something on
His own he won't he shakes and screams in blind panic
This film had a silly scary clown doll in it he's convinced its going to get him
I have reassured over and over that its not real but nothing works?

[worrymum]

Yes completly agree with you I was the same as a child...at the moment I'm trying to avoid talking about it but when coming to explaining the diffence between reality and make beleive its hard to do so? I've gave examples to the dvds he's already got and they arnt real and people are acting like he has in plays etc. Thankyou for all the advice x  

[adgal]

I can see why he is acting this way.  To this day I don't watch horror movies because even as an adult they give me nightmares and I wind up wanting to sleep with the lights on.  I can remember seeing one or two as a young teen, and from then on my parents knew they were not a good choice for me.  

I think your going to have just wait this out.  The movie has had a huge impact on him.  I would ask him if he wants to talk about it, then use that opportunity to teach him/show him these things aren't real.  Other then that, I would just let him be. He is dealing with it the best way he can at this point.  Poor little guy, the movie must have scared him out of his wits.  

BTW...one of the movies that scared me was Poltergeist....my mom had to get rid of my clown doll after that.  And I was 12 or something.  There was an article on a childs brain development in Parenting Magazine recently.  At the age of 4 children still think in fantasy rather then reality.  So things like the idea of the bathtub drain sucking them up are very very real to them.  Same with toilet flushing being able to suck them in, etc.  So to see am movie like that..well he can't differentiate between fantasy and reality yet.  

[margypops]

It will pass, its a moment in time , let him do it, be cool about it, not feed into it, I can see why you are concerned , its the change in him  , i doubt it will last but a word with the doctor if it does wont hurt.Bet he will be carefree again soon, let us know and good luck to you .

[worrymum]

By fetch and carry I ment...takening him the toilet etc when he's been doing this fine for over a year or when he wants something from his room I have to go with him..1hen he's always gone in and out as he pleases because we have no stairs x

[worrymum]

Your rite it does irritate me...because he
Is such an independant little boy getting
His own coat and shoes from his bedroom
Getting his own yogurt and spoon after tea
Or playing with his toys (he won't even sit in the same room and play on the floor with them) and to see he's scared
To do this annoys me like its taken the carefree child out of him...I no its not his fault.
I've been takeing your advice today and we've had
No tears.he's been following me and helping we've not talked about it either x thankyou

[margypops]

Dont get to the stage of a 'war' for the moment if it was me i would allow him to follow me , let him help you, I may be wrong but it sounds as if it irritates you and he can hear see it, he is feeling vunerable and needs reassurance ,I would let him follow you but dont be irritated, dont talk about it, he may get bored after a while .From reading your post it does sound like you are feeding into it.What do you mean by fetch and carry ?

[worrymum]

So glad to get sum advice.yes his grandparents
We're very sorry and diddnt realise the content
As it said family friendly.
I don't no what to do with his staying by me
Constantly...I live in a flat so he can come
And go from his bedroom etc this useualy happens
But not since the film..-i have to stand with
Him at the toilet which is not 6foot from the
Living room and all things of this kind? Do I
Just let him follow me and fetch n carry after him
Or make him do it himself...which causes a war
Of tears panic and shakeing (I know this isn't for attention or wanting me
To do it)..

[margypops]

Not a good idea for his grand parents to allow this to happen ...Stop the reaussrance now its probably over kill and you are feeding the frenzy ..least said the better.. if he brings it up say nothing distract him ...Older siblings do lead younger children into 'mischief ' protect him ...

[worrymum]

* watched once...not watches