My 7 year old son is hard work , , as soon as my son wakes up till the time he goes to bed ,he always mouthing me off and always doing everything i tell him not to , he acts like a 14 year old , he thinks he is much older then he is, everything is a battle with him , an i cant stand him most days, when 3 o'clock comes round i dread the thourght of collecting him from school,
I try and be reasonable with him, and talk things through calmly with him, but he dosnt take any notice at all, when i take him out he always shows me up, shouting n playing up in the street, i feel imbarrised when im out with him and even when i have visitors round,there is nothing wrong with him as he is top off his class at school, and when he is looked after by his nan or my partners mum, he is so well behaved, iv had comments from the school to say how extreamly good he is and well mannered he is, but when he gets home , his a totaly different boy ,
iv even had friends say to me that the way he acts is not right, and his hard work , i hate it , he treats my partner like a stranger he will say good night to me and his brother that is a year old and not my partner me and my partner have been together nearly 4 years, my partner dosnt treat him any different from his brother.
My son gets on well when there is only him and my partner there like a 1 to 1 they get on realy well as soon as i come in he starts and plays up ,thats the case when ever he is his good with other people as soon as i turn up his off one one , and i dont know why his is doing this i try with him, i do punish him iv tryed everything from taking toys away ,grounding , shouting , talking, smacking nothing works with him, but iv also tryed praising him when he does do things right. i dont understand why he is good with every one eles but naughty when his with me.
It sounds to me as if he is trying to gain your attention especially as he only behaves like this with you, he maybe jealous of your BF and as you have a 1 year old I am guessing he gets less attention than he used to .Does your BF take an interest in him , do they play ga,mes and do gut things, it has to come from the adult so I would encourage your partner to make some effort to be friend him .
I agree with Margypops. For about 5 years he had your undivided attention and now he doesn't. He has not been getting the attention that he once got. Nobody's fault. So what do you do - if its only happening mainly at home. Well, one thing is to pay him more attention. A easy and very productive way is to buy a wonderful set of books aimed at the 4 to 7 year old kid. Read them to him every night. The books will give him better ways to control himself and also give you ways to talk to him about his control - and its a great one on one time. A good start would probably be "cool down and work through anger". It can be found here - http://www.amazon.com/Cool-Through-Anger-Learning-Along/dp/1575423464/ref=pd_sim_b_3
If you then scroll down you will see other very helpful titles and each one you click on will lead to other choices.
And of course, he also has to know that there are consequences for his choices. Love and logic (google it) is a great book. I also recommend "SOS Help for Parents," by Lynn Clark, which uses the timeout system.
thank you yes you maybe right, he dose get attention and we both share reading time at night before he goes to bed every night ,my partner dose try with him to do activitys with him, but then soon as he trys feels like my partner is being knocked back al the time , i do try and give him as much attention as possible, if i cant spend the 1 to 1 with him then , i try and involve him in helping make dinner or help me bathing his brother ect, but then he soon looses intrest
My opinion is yes he keeps on going, he is the adult..step parenting is never easy there are many posts simila rto yours , no easy answers than befriending him making him feel wanted by you both, he is probably jealous of the attention your partner receives .What form does the'knocking back ' take what does your son do that is upsetting to your partner?
i think its the fact that he dose try and do things and give him attention and my son will just not want to intreact with him no matter how much he trys , since i posted this on here iv made more then enough time for my son an when i have to do dinner or its time for bed he then plays me up , so it cant be the attention from me that he wants because iv given him so much,that i cant give him attention when i have to stop an take care of something quick ,x
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