separation anxiety

[myra5150]

My daughter is 12yrs. old and has severe seperation anxiety disorder. We've tried everything to help her.She is now being home schooled because of the constant crying and worriness and she will not walk through the school dooors. Her anxiety always starts the night before she has to go to school.My husband and I have taken her to a counseler, and it still seems like nothings helping?Shes a very beautiful girl,has plenty of friends. We are very blessed to have such a great kid. But sometimes I feel like im holding her back from living a normal life by enabling her and giving into home school.Anybody out there that can help our situation?

[jac918]

make sure nothing has happened to her at school. make sure no teachers have made advances etc. people are so discusting these days, just make sure that is not a possibility. i know from taking anxiety and panic attack medicine that it rewires your brain and body after a while, you may want to read up on the effects of this type of med on a childs body and brain before you consider putting her on one.

[stlmom]

Hi! I am a mom with a beautiful daughter also. She is 14 and has acute school phobia/anxiety and seperation issues in the past (main trigger was the death of her grandpa (she was playing with him when he dropped of a heart attack:HORRIBLY) This started at age 12 and she will be 15 soon. Please type in 'school phobia' and read my post.  Remember that you love her and always do what is right for HER 'NOT' the school or anyone else. The middle school handled my daughters situation terribly. They sinply did not know what to do for her and just wanted us both  to go away. I have been through 2 psychiatrist (both great), 1 psychiologist, and 2 treatments centers and now St. Louis County Courts. I am educating everyone I meet about this condition due to the overwhelming ignorance in our schools and society. I will also do whatever it takes legally to resolve this. Good luck to you and your beautiful daughter!!!!!......STLMOM  

[jdtm]

Anxiety is treatable.  Treatment consists of intervention, therapy and, if necessary, medication.  Your daughter needs to see a medical doctor with experience in anxiety disorders as a child psychiatrist, or child neurologist, or even a child psychologist (although it is possible you will require a M.D. if medication is required).  There is hope but it becomes more difficult to treat childhood anxiety as the child becomes older (and your child fits into that category).  The teen years are especially difficult to treat as the anxiety behaviours can become ingrained and a part of the child's personality; however, this is not a reason to forgo getting help.  I assure you if anxiety is the issue, your daughter will not outgrow it nor will it go away.  Anxiety is a physical, emotional and mental issue and so counseling alone will not "cure" it.

I do not know whether or not you are enabling her (and frankly it is not that important at this point in time), but first you do need to seek professional help.  Begin by asking your family doctor for a referral to a specialist with experience in treating anxiety disorders (preferably experience with children).   It will not be a short path, but it is better than the one you are on.  While you are waiting for the doctor's appointment, you might wish to google the term "school refusal" or "childhood anxiety" or "teenage anxiety" on the internet in order to better educate yourself about this issue.  Please call your doctor as soon as possible.  I wish you the best ....