seperation anxiety/over all anciety in 8 year old

My 8 year old son is having what I feel are anxiety issues.  He gets himself so worked up that he feels he is going to vomit and at times he gets himself constipated.  For instance tonight his best friend invited him over for a overnight party, well I told the parents that I don't think he'll stay the night, but he could go for a few hours.  I just left him and he was in the hallway crying.  I feel like a horrible mom, but what else can I do?  I feel like it's my fault cause I babied him so much when he was younger, I was a stay at home mom, and now I am a preschool teacher at the same school he goes too.  Any advice would be useful.  Thank you

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

Small doses of such contact will help him, but don't push it too far. Just do what he is ready for. It will help if he has a couple of sleepovers at your house, so he warms up to the idea. It would be sensible to have him evaluated to see if his level of anxiety invites professional help.

[Hez5]

Is it normal for the anxiety to only be when preparing or gearing up for school?  My 8 year old daughter wakes up and immediately starts crying because she doesn't want to go to school?  She only wants to be with me.... or so she says.  She doesn't have any issue with over nights at a friend or family members house... it's just revolving around school.  She's been like this off and on all 3 1/2 years of school.  It breaks my heart to drop her off in the morning, tears running down her cheeks, begging me to not make her go.

I'm meeting with her teacher tomorrow to see if there are any issues... but she says that her teacher and classmates are fine, and after the past few years of these experiences I believe she is telling me the truth.  

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

Yes, separation anxiety is often manifested in children in relation to school. They key variable is whether they are able to settle right into school once they are there and go about the school day without a problem.