seperation anxiety

[jmba]

My daughter is 6months old and was recently kicked out of a daycare because she was crying for the two and a half hours she was there. She would sleep for about 30 to 40 mins while she was there. Otherwise they say they couldn't comfort her in anyway. We gave them several suggestions and they said none of them worked. So after three weeks of going there they asked her not to come back. I think they should have given her more time to get use to the place since she was only there for two and half hours. This daycare is run by a local hospital and the staff is all certified. I'm worried that if they say they can't calm her down, that we will have a hard time anywhere else we take her. Is there anything else we can do to help get her over this problem? Because her brother goes there and loves the place (he is 3) so we would like to solve this so they both can go there.

Thank You
James

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

No, at this age all you can do is leave your child in the hands of qualified people. In the vast majority of instances, the child does adapt. I wish I could offer you a more expeditious approach, but there really isn't one.

[toothy]

i am worried about my grandson He is 2yrs.old. He and his mother live at home with grandparents.  He hates gone to see his father.  We  try and never say negitive things about the father,in front of the child.  When his father comes to pick him up on Mondays and Thurs.Mondays being an over night visit,He crys and crys and says he doesnt like daddy,he doesnt like his other grandparents, as soon as he sees his car pull up, he starts crying.  On Tues. it is a living nitemare,He screams and crys and has nitemares.  I think he is too young for over nite stays because it is really upsetting the child.His father says he doesnt care if the child crys, he will not bring him home,He does not care if the child is sick,the baby better be there or the father has the mother in contempt of court.  Can you suggest anything that can help us.

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

If the father persists, there's little you can do - he is exercising the prerogatives he possesses, apparently, according to the custody decree that is part of the divorce resolution. Unfortunately, the youngster really is too young to be staying overnight in this fashion.

In some jurisdictions, you can request the appointment of what is called a guardian ad litem, whose job it is to look out for the child's best interest. Such persons are appointed by courts for various reasons. In this instance, the purpose would be to evaluate the custody arrangement and to make a recommendation to the Court.