should I see a child phycologist?

[diamondmiss]

My six year old suddenly seems to be having "seperation" issues with me. I've recently enrolled him in a wrestling team for some physical activity and social as well. At first he loved it. Suddenly he got a cold and was not feeling well, he started to cry and said he needed to sit out b/c he wasn't feeling well. He stayed on my lap with his hands around my neck the entire time crying everytime I asked him if he wanted to get back out and join the children. Every wrestling practice since he has cried and said he did not want to do it. The crying was strange I eventually let him quit but explained to him that he can not be a "quitter" in life. Since then he has been crying when my husband takes him to school. I've given him the benifit of the doubt when he says he's just not feeling well. I let him stay home from school a couple of days thinking he has a headache and stomach ache or something. I had a talk with him today and said "NO CRYING ON YOUR WAY TO SCHOOL TODAY, GO TO SCHOOL AND MAKE UP YOUR TESTS AND MAKE GOOD GRADES". I've also taught him what truency was b/c of the fact that I did not like school and I wanted to put the fear into him before he started to just NOT WANT TO GO TO SCHOOL. He cried all the way to school saying "I just miss you mommy". He just can't bare the thought of leaving me for one second to even go to school. I'm wanting to know if he's suddenly having seperation issuses or has he just been babied TOO much. He is the only child and I have gone to extreams to pet on him ALOT. But is this a matter that should be brought to the attention of a phycologist  when it is interfering with our everyday life like just going to school?


This discussion is related to New fears and lack of confidence at age 6.

[jdtm]

It does appear you are dealing with separation anxiety.  If so, then the anxiety "gene" was probably there at birth and is part of his personality.  The best way to handle anxiety is through patience and understanding; not through orders and yelling/talking  (which you have already learned do not work).  Fear and discipline will not work either - the only thing that will work is the "lessening of the anxiety".

First, you might wish to google the phrase "separation anxiety in children" or "anxiety and children" or similar words/phrases to get a better understanding of this issue.  Hopefully, you should able to find some ideas on how to deal with this issue in some of your readings.  Then, I would discuss this issue with your son's pediatrician or family doctor.  If he/she feels that your son requires specialized treatment, then that referral could be made.  I wish you the best .....