stealing at 11 yrs old

[lostgrandma]

MY grandson is 11 yrs old and we are having alot of trouble with him lying, and stealing. he has been doing this for about 3 years now and his parents as well as my self have done alot of different things see if we can put a stop to this but nothign ever works. We are scared this is becoming serious and he is becoming a juvenile delinquent he has stole from me money, jewelry, and not sure what else he might of taken at this time we are finding other things by looking around his room now. HE stole some jewelry from me today I  bought at an auction knowing I would looking for it when I got home. he took it to the car for me at the auction and then hide it in his pants till he got home and went to his room and hide it in there I called adn ask him were it was at and his mom knew he was lying so he seen he had been caught so he told me he had it. that was 3 of the rings then later after my son his dad searched his room he found 2 more rings he did not tell us about and one of my rings I had at my house he had went through my jewelry and taken it out at sometime and hide it in his room when  he got home. I had not idea this one was missing. he also tryed to get some money out of my purse today think he was about caught so he said hte money fell out of my billfold and he found it in my purse. which there was no way it fell out of my billfold so I confronted him about his and he said he took it out by accident which I know was not the truth I think his dad come to the car when he was in there and he dropped it in my purse like he found it in there by accident. We are lost for what to do he has been grounded, punished, and had counseling and nothing works. he is AHAD but I am not sure if that has anyting to do with it at all. What can we do OR who do we talk to to put a stop to this before this child ended up in prison when he gets older. he does not have alot of friends because he lyies and is hard to get along with alot of the time. he uses his Hyper problem as an excuse for why he did something he said I have a problem or I missed my medicine so I am hyper I can't help what I do cause of that he knows how to use this to his advantage. What can we do? who do we contact? we are about to put him in a home or hospital for kids with problems behaviors is that the answer????
LoveGrandma

[margypops]

It may be a better idea to figure out why he is doing it, I am confused why you would leave jewellry around for him to take how did this come about? It would be good to ask his parents to get some counselling for him let him talk to someone ,  to find out why he is doing it instead of the talk of hospitals and homes, I hope he doesnt hear this kind of talk.If he is on Meds they do have side effects and certainly this would add to the problem .

[lostgrandma]

I did not have jewelry laying around he got in my draws and got it. and he has been in counseling many time, and his parents have had counseling with him as well. WHY he is doing this is something we have no idea of. this is why we keep asking him that and he says I dont know. we have ask and ask and there is NO answer why he is loved and has all the attention a kids can get. something has to be done before he is any older. his aunt MY DAUGHTER did the same thing at a young age and I did not do anything about it and figued she would out grow it well she did not she has left her kids, spent 6 months in prison, and is not running from the law. so this is a real concern in my part to not have another person with this problem whom I love dearly.  

[margypops]

Is he on any meds for the ADHD ? I do understand your concern, did the counselors have no answers for you, children do say I dont know very often they think they will get in trouble if they say. Is he an only child ?

[teddybears4ever2]

I don't to scare you, but if he doesn't get help now this could turn into a real problem.  You don't want him to be one of those people who when he comes around everyone grabs their possessions in terror and hides them.  
You see my brother-in-law, has these friends that have been stealing all of their lives.  They never really got the help they needed and now they steal.  When I used to live back home whenever the came in the house I'd got upstairs, pretend I was doing something else and grab my purse as fast as I could.  
You need to get him into some kind of intervention now, don't just take him to counseling when he takes something, but make him go, no matter what. I know this is not what you want to here, but this is something you need to deal with right now.

[Diva2317]

My sisters used to sneak into my room when I was younger and steal all my spare change. I would get very upset with them even though it wasn't much money because they just shouldn't steal. I probably would have given them the change if they had just asked. Today one of them shoplifts and has gotten caught doing it. It's still a serious problem for her.

I work as a waitress and it is the most frustrating thing when people run out on their bill. When we are busy it's not always easy to watch 7-10 tables at once. It happens, but it's not a good thing when grown adults do something they know is wrong. You don't want him to end up like that. Make sure there are consequences every time he steals or lies and hopefully he'll get it. Just keep at it. Good luck figuring out what to do!