why enrolled in anger management course

[bigsistergrimm]

I hear that my 9/10 year old grandson has been enrolled in such a course.  He is a very stoic chap, with a strong sense of 'what is right'. He is protective of his family, and their foibles. For example when I commented that his elder half brother should not have used (his younger brother's)  sit-on tractor, he corrected me and said that he had made a mistake and that in fact it was he himself who had used the toy tractor .  From what I have heard, if he wants any of his elder brother's toys, he has to buy them from his brother. His mother now has a new partner who has emailed my grandson's father to say that he can only speak to his son on speaker phone.

To add to this the boy's father, my son, is not speaking to me, I know not why.The parents are divorced, inamacalby, and this boy is trying to please everyone, but it is obviously getting him down.  Hence the anger management What can I do ??

[bigsistergrimm]

thank you for your comments.  However, I can not wade in, as it would just make things worse, particularly as I have very little contact with Arch, and I would just be another source of pressure for him.   I am trusting that he will not be too damaged, will trust himself, and will come into his own in the next five years......

[bigsistergrimm]

thank you for your comments.  I agree, as I do not want to wade in having never really been included in my grand son's life, and having not seen him for nearly 3 years, since moving north, on my own.  The boy lives in Devon whilst his father lives in Bristol with Archie's young half sister, who Archie loves dearly. He just seems to be carrying too many burdens, and keeps saying that he wants to live with his father.  Hence, I imagine, the new edict that he can only speak to his father on speaker phone.  My heart breaks for him as he must feel that he belongs nowhere any more.  I would not dream, (in this day and age) of interfering, although in a different time I would have leapt on my horse and carried him away.  grandparents have no authority these days!

[Sandman2]

   Um, the above sounds more like a last resort.
    The thing that you need to do is to support the child.  Anger management courses can be a very good thing.  Many parents would balk at putting their child in any kind of therapy.  I think it is a good thing and should help, not hurt him (if done correctly).  
   Its tough to be on the outside looking in - especially at this time of the year!  The way to get back inside is to not be judgmental, but loving and supporting.
Best wishes.  

[caregiver222]

For various reasons they have chosen to exclude you from your grandsons life. I would suggest you tell them if you are not allowed reasonable interaction you will go to family court and seek mandated visiting rights. Alternatively you can go directly to family court.