Negative thinking, wrong emotions

My negative thinking from OCD has made me believe I am a bad person, and that when I die I'll go to hell. Are these thinking's involuntary? Like take for instance if something catastrophic happen in the word whether it be here or in another country I sometimes feel happy or excited or glad....WHAT IS THAT? I'm really scared. Why are my emotions the total opposite that they should be? Of course I don't want anything bad to happen  but I fee; like an evil person and that I will burn in hell.

[Ted A Grossbart, Ph.D.]

As we discussed last round, and as you know, this is all a common part of OCD.  As I'm sure you are discussing with your therapist, you can take more and more control over this.

I wonder beyond that if you were taught earlier in life that you are not who you are supposed to be (according to their ideas).  This can be direct or very subtle and 'between the lines.'  

Often people are given 'life missions' like "Unite the family", or "Make your mother a happy person."  These assignments are impossible and leave the kid with a pervasive feeling of badness or inadequacy,

This sort of 'brainwashing' can combine forces with a tendency to OCD and make both worse.

tg

[autumnsky]

My doctor put me on  one 10mg of Zyprexa (Olanzapine) for the molestation thoughts cuz they were feeling all too real. They're going away somewhat. I'm taking two 2 mg of Risperdol for it too as well wit a combo of other meds for anxiety. How soon will the thoughts go away COMPLETELY?

[Ted A Grossbart, Ph.D.]

It may well be unrealistic (though very understandable) to look for the meds to be a total off switch.  You need more tools.

Are you in psychotherapy as well as the meds?

tg

[autumnsky]

No, but I am currently in the process of seeking a therapist. Thank you