Hard stools caused constipation which caused Anal fissures, now what do I do?

As the title suggests, the other day I was constipated and could not for the life of me get the stool to pass but it was not painful. It would just be sort of stuck and not get anywhere so after a few hours on the toilet I guess I got impatient and tried to push a bit harder to get it out which caused me to strain before giving up and still not getting it out.

So I bought some laxatives and stool softener and waited 2 hours or so before trying again. When I went to try again, the stool was soft enough to pass this time thanks to the laxatives/stool softener i believe, but the problem was just that it was so painful that I had to stop very early on. Pretty sure the straining I did caused an anal fissure or was at least responsible for the pain, where now, even though it's soft, it hurts too much to continue.

So now here I am, needing to have a bowel movement very badly but unable to do so because of the pain associated with it. What to do in this situation? Do you just go through with it anyway to get it out? I took preparation H about 5 hours ago but I can still feel the pain every 30mins or so when my bowel movement starts wanting its way out and I have to hold it back in. I assume if I can feel the pain even without pushing then it's a sign that actually pushing will once again be super painful. Everywhere I read online they talk about letting the anal fissure heal, but I can't find any advice on what to do if it's too painful to even have the BM to begin with.

I've already gone a couple days with holding it in even though I have to go bad, trying to wait another 2 days may be hard, especially if its still throbbing pain after those 2 days anyway.

[JACKIEBO]

My son just had his second surgery for fishers. When he was very young 3yrs. he would constitpation and his peds. nurse had him drink mineral oil with orange twice a day along with a laxative. This realy help and allow the stool to slip out with less pain. Also the doctor can perscribe a numbing cream to help the pain of pass the bm. You don't want to get fisures or hold your stool, it will only cause worse problems. hope this helps.